Life as a Watermelon

Malaysia Boleh....

2007-10-27T21:11:00.000+08:00

.... afford to send a man to space

but

no money to budget to buy the policemen bullet proof vests....

-read Musa orders thorough probe

If the official religion is not ....

2007-07-24T12:35:00.000+08:00

They would have served this in McDonald's

BEER!!!!!

But then i guess this can only happen in Germany. Anyway just imagine if they do serve beer at
McD's in Malaysia, think they will also need to equip all outlets with some Tai Wah Sik and playing cards....

ohh.. and maybe some GROs walking around asking if we want to refill the beer....

Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmy........................

Just for Laughs

2007-05-29T10:27:00.000+08:00

A Russian and an American wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic gold medal. Before the final match, the American wrestler’s trainer came to him and said, “Now, don’t forget all the research we’ve done on this Russian. He’s never lost a match because of this ‘pretzel’ hold he has. Whatever you do, don’t let him get you in this hold! If he does, you’re finished!”

The wrestler nodded in acknowledgement.

As the match started, the American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold.

A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd, and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost. He couldn’t even watch the ending.

Suddenly, there was a scream, a cheer from the crowd, and the trainer raised his eye just in time to watch the Russian flying up in the air. The Russian’s back hit the mat with a thud, and the American collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.

The trainer was astounded. When he finally got the American wrestler alone, he asked, “How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!”

The wrestler answered, “Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold, but at the last moment I opened my eyes and saw this pair of balls right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could.”

“So,” the trainer exclaimed, “that finished him off, did it?”

“No, but you’d be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!”

Liar Liar

2007-05-16T23:03:00.000+08:00

First it was....

Jasin MP denies making ‘bocor’ comment

But then today after

Group hands over memo to minister, demands apology

Then they

MPs apologise for sexist remarks

Sepandai-pandai tupai melompat akhirnya

BOCOR jugak temberang dia

My mother would have slap me hard on the head if i degrade woman like that... guess finally theirs got to em....

*UPDATE 17/5*

TAPI kan... today

MP says sorry to women, then retracts his apology

OI BODOHS... move on with life la... is it so difficult to just say

I A M S O R R Y!

Say de everyone forgets and it'll b over la! I believe the mothers did not slap em hard enough.............

Cubs or Char Siew?

2007-05-03T13:23:00.000+08:00

When a Mama Tiger gave birth to 5 cubs... all died...

Mama tiger very da sad... everyday no mood to eat.... no mood to go entertain zoo visitors...

Zoo tiger cage area become no intresting. cuz mama tiger dun wanna come out of her room.

zoo management ask around other zoo see can borrow cubs back or not to help the mama tiger... but right gum ngam none had any baby tigers,... if got also borrow u for what chekkkk! in malaysia 1 cub = RM15k leh!

so some smart guy came out with this crazy idea to dress up baby piggies in tiger costume.

No laaa.. not like that.. that's a human baby in a tiger costume....

This is how pigs in tiger costume look like

Anyway the mama tiger become happy again cuz reunited with her 5 cubs(piglets) ... mama tiger proudly show the visitors her babies

It's just time till the the mama tiger will notice that she's actually fed 5 char siew her powerful fearsome tiger milk. i'm sure this pig would taste good as suckling pigs on dinner table :P~~~

there use to be this chinese proverb about some tiger/fox in pigs costume so can migle with the piggies and the feast on em....

however after seeing this pictures... we'll know we've came a long way from those ancient scholar proverbs as all the wisdom words might not even mean anything in a decade or so from now.

This is real : Thailand Zoo

Milk milk milk.............

2007-04-02T11:10:00.000+08:00

Firstly as usual an appology for not being able to add more dirty thoughts to spice up ya daily routines. I've been busy with work and at the same time looking a new job. all this while i try catch enough rest.

anyway was chatting to T on MSN couple of days back, talking about porn and all when suddenly, asked him this funny question. How does breastmilk taste? I assumed all new daddies are just as curious as me on how it taste......

"No Taste" He said..

No taste? as in taste like water? Dilluted cowmilk? goat milk? or taste like coke susu? then i spoke to another friend, his answer was "aiyah duno how to explain"

i guess now i have another reason to get marry. Get the wife pregnant, give birth and then can try out the breastmilk. how else could i like be able to know how it taste. unless T wanna share his milk bottle with me.... which i think is unlikely

just to clear things up; T tasted it from the leftover in the milkbottle of his kid. not directly from the source. :P (why was there leftover in the firstplacE??)

All this while, I've alwiz thought breastmilk taste da goood. until i had this conversation with T. Look at the baby' eyes. how could it not be good? how can something that's tasteless could be so good for the babies?

By the way breastfeeding is damn sexy ok........

And someday i hope i can tell u how it taste too.....

Moolaysia in the eyes of a Koala

2006-11-15T17:48:00.000+08:00

Recently did a post on an incident that i experienced which i think is pretty unfair. As a minority, there's really nothing much we can do but to yell, knock ya head on the wall and hope someday ya future will be able to do better than what you did.

My biggest mistake in life is that i've not fight hard enough, firstly with my parents n secondly myself to have continued staying and getting a job there in Australia. and from there hopefully applying for their PR'ship.

Anyway after years back, i gave up such thoughts. i'm sure many others have the same thought. Believe of things changing for the better back here. and slowly giving up ever on the thought that things are as good as we r told.

Anyway enough of the self pity.... my point here is. we are so used to things around that sometimes what we see is quite not what it really is. How people look at us is what is what we really are. i can tell everyone i'm a goat. but when they look at me, they will still say i'm a cow.

In the land of Koalas, an article was published in The Age (other than the Herald Sun that's the other newspaper i read in Australia) An article by a Koala on what he think of Moolaysia and the cows here.

"While Moolaysia fiddles, its opportunities are running dry"

Snips from the article,
------
Moolaysians are very proud of these towers(de twin towers). Goodness knows why. They had little to do with them. The money for them came out of the ground and the engineering was contracted out to South Korean companies.

They don't even run the shopping centre that's beneath them. That's handled by Australia's Westfield.
-----
Next year, a Moolaysian astronaut will go into space aboard a Russian rocket — the first Malay in space. And the cost? $RM95 million ($A34.3 million), to be footed by Moolaysian taxpayers. The Science and Technology Minister has said that a moon landing in 2020 is the next target, aboard a US flight. There's no indication of what the Americans will charge for this, assuming there's even a chance that they will consider it. But what is Moolaysia getting by using the space programs of others as a taxi service?
----
Back in July, the Government announced that it would spend $RM490 million on a sports complex near the London Olympics site so that Moolaysian athletes can train there and "get used to cold weather".
But the summer Olympics are held in the summer.
----

Now the whole of the Koala-kind will look at us cows as some failure. Some no brainer.

Anyway, just go read the article la. but then b warn it'll make u quite depress ok..

I would have ended this post with a Malaysia Boleh bolded red in color as off some of my previous posts. But then in the article, the Koala just pointed this out to me at the end of his article;

That's not Malaysia "boleh", that's Malaysia "bodoh" (stupid).

Now I'm confuse............................

BTW, i came about this article from jeffooi.com

M I C

2006-11-04T19:06:00.000+08:00

not Samy's Party..... stands for Made In China......

macam macam in china..... you know why things in china are cheap? cuz they know how to cut cost and no need simply waste money....

Someday when u finally figure out why the things they produce are so cheap compared to others? u'll go "fucckkk my backside, why didn't i think of it...."

I can't read chinese. so someone might wanna help me with what it means above

To me it look like some blood donation drive. or some Hep A/B/C injection awareness program or something. So i'm sure this is some govt sponsored/approved sign boards. The nurse is one sweet looking china chick. :P~ i don't mind falling sick n having her taking care of me.

TAPI KAN!... if u look closely at the needles... where the fark got needles so big in hospital la... but right.... this needles right can usually be found,

Here....

Minori Aoi's Cosplay Video.

Tittle : "Nurse Go! Go!" - Do Sukebe Clinic

Yeah! she's the actress in some Japanese Adult Video. The picture was rip'ed off her video's coverpage. Anyway a google of her name will give u a whole load of nice pictures of her :) This is a preview of what u'll be seeing :)

CHINA BOLEH!!

Artist? Villian?

2006-10-31T11:31:00.000+08:00

Firstly, my appologies from being away for sometime. The weddings..the work.. finally month of Oct is over and i'm now back again.

Haven't manage to catch up with the guys. so not much cock to write about. however here's some shit i think which is pretty interesting.

Dragon told me about this friend of his. One saturday afternoon WanSan@vincent came lookin for him and ask him out for a drink. This WS guy usually has plenty of gals around him. the same guy i was with at Bintang sometime back. anyway that day he insisted dragon to drive the Benz out.

after drinks, he then suggested to go see cars at this famous luxury car trader. Dragon obliged. so two of them drove to the showroom in a benz n greeted by the salesmen. walked around the showroom like some big boss and all.. commenting on the sport cars like they can afford it with their monthly salary. then WS picked a car and told the salesman he wanted it. dragon got shocked but did not say anything. he nearly fainted when WS pointed to another sports car n said "i'll take that car too"

the look on the salesman was like, wahh he hit his monthly target in like 15 mins... damn happy. so they went to the counter. sat down. he went over the sales details with WS. WS pulled out his cheque book. wrote a cheque for the figure of downpayment he needed to pay. left his contact and salesman passed him the downpayment receipt and say will call him once the paperwork and the car is ready for collection.

they left the place and headed down to KL for clubbing. that nite they hang out with friends' of friends and WS saw a chick he was intrested in. started talking cock to this chick n all. he then talked about what he did this afternoon.

WS : this afternoon nothing to do so i went see some cars
Girl : ohh..buying a car? what car are u planning to buy woh?
WS : ohh duno what's it name de... u see for yaself la. i bought 2.
*WS pass the receipt for the downpayment he made to the chicky*

Girl : wah! nice cars *eyes glowing*

to cut story short.. that nite they walk off somewhere quiet. chat shortly and the gal said something about a trip or something she wanted to go n WS took out his cheque book and wrote her a $10,000 cheque.

to cut the story shorter.. hahahaha that nite she opened up her legs damn wide....

<------------------------this wide----------------------->

But then i'm sure when she try bank in the cheque on monday and it gets bounced; her mouth would be like

(-------------------------------------even wider-----------------------------------)

p/s this WS guy has gone underwater(hiding) for some time now. i brand him as a con artist for what he thought of and done not just to girl$ like the above but to friends too. no one knows where he is. i'm sure alot of people currently is looking him.

Come October.....

2006-10-02T14:28:00.000+08:00

There'll be like 4 weddings to go to.. Every weekend someone will be gettin attach to a new part of their life.

Calvin Low a friend from school will be marrying on 7th of October at the Nikko Hotel.

Kim another school friend will be marrying on 14th of October at Tropicana Club HOuse.

Cousin, JT will be having his wedding on 21st Oct at Mandarin Oriental.

And another school friend Kelvin Goh will be having his wedding on the 28th Oct at a location which i hve not asked yet.

on 28 there's also a wedding of a school friend; Lena which i have no idea where either.

Everyone's getting marry. who's gonna be left for me to call out to go for drinks... no more happy hour kaki.. no more mamak kaki......

i think for the last few single friends of mine i should start on a mission to make sure they never get attach. I shall be evil n make sure Jeff remains single.... till at least i get attach. evil plans to make sure ben alwiz argue with the gf.. then we can go out drinking.. (hahaha sorry ben!)

why do people have to get marry other than to have sex without condoms and then multiply and then start worring about payin for childs education... childs wellfare... why bring this upon yaself when u have a choice?

if u think i sound quite bitter cuz all my friends have found happiness. tat's so untrue. they are happy drinking beer with me.... we were happy during the days at those sleazy KTVs.... we were happy when we alll slept on the floor after a nite of partying... if that is not happy enough.. can together gather smoke some shit and then also happy happy :) why must get marry?

sigh..... is it time for me now to have my feet on the ground n be like them? i'm not sure if i can handle commitment. not sure if when attached; i would b allow to go out for to do my shits.... not sure if i'm ready to let go of my current routines..... not sure if i get attach now, it would all shatter in a year or two and i'll have to start over again.... not sure of so many things....

tell me, tell me that my current routines are bad... tell me there r happier things than just sex in a relationship..... tell me the satisfaction of just holding each others hand... it's been so damn long.. it's been so many moons.. and maybe if i can remember how it feels... i might just be nice, and wish the above congratulations.....

Suicide Machine

2006-09-30T10:48:00.000+08:00

In china now.. u'll find a kinda machine to terminate yaself :)

Now that is convinient :)

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

2006-09-28T16:37:00.000+08:00

A time ago, in the far away land of Moolaysia.. live many many cows...

There r the brown cows who claim they own the land thus need not worry about shortage of grass to eat, the yellow cows who's worked and worked for many years just so they can have a better life for the kids so their younger calves will be able to grow strong and move to a better land. a place where they are not ranked as second class mootizens.

there are also a minority of black cows who all this years of hard work are still as they are because the leader of the black cows is alledged to pocket whatever that was suppose to be meant to them. the black cows can't even have their leader fight for enough schools for them... what's more taking care of their basic needs....

this month is a celebration month for the brown cows where they do good and self-reflect the bad things they have done; and repent. still many many things are only superficial.

this is the month where the Cowabanga comes out in full force working day n nite setting up road blocks to nab the "offenders". in nice words, putting away and summoning the road hazards. on another hand, everycows know it's the extra side mooney they are after.

One afternoon in a road block, there were about 5 cowabangas doing a road block, stopping drivers who's cutting queue at an intersection which is always congested. good thing right? for the queue-cutters are the cause of congestions and should be removed off the road till they learn to line up.

Many cars got stopped, however some manage to drive off instantly. Upon further observation, all the brown cow drivers are lets off, while the yellow n black cows were stopped n being fine.

Every year, all cows doesn't matter what their colors were asked to raise the SAME flag, moo the SAME anthem, but yet.............. these are the things they r still being treated with as a "dan lain lain lagi" mootizen.

Everymoo raise the same flag,

Everymoo bow to the same Kings,

Everymoo sing the same anthem,

Everymoo live by the same commandments,

Yet, SOME FUCKING COWS DON'T GET SAMAN!

p/s no i did not get fine or anything.... the anger is only from observation, surely worse if i was the victim........ i hope my next generation would be smarter n capable of moving to a better land.... sometimes i still have this little hope that things in Moolaysia will change for the better, but then, after 49 years of independence..... the little hope is close to fading....

Do you notice these in Korean Series

2006-09-20T13:35:00.000+08:00

Chinese fans of Korean soap operas were baffled to see Koreans use both spoons and chopsticks to eat, but not as surprised as when they saw women pull each other's hair during fights and managers strike their subordinates on the back of the head. Other notable features of Korean society for the Chinese couch potatoes are the vast difference in treatment meted out to rich and poor here and the number of marriages of convenience. In all, the China Finance Information Network drew up 80 strange Korean customs as gleaned from TV dramas. Here are 12 of them:

1. When Koreans lift their glass to drink any alcoholic beverage with someone senior, they always turn to one side. i tilt my head one side and try not to establish eye contacts when drinking with people who can get me drunk in 3 blinks....

2. If a Korean's glass is empty they pass the bottle to the person sitting with them. (In Korean culture it is frowned upon to pour yourself a glass; the proper etiquette is pouring for each other.) same thing in chinese tea serving right?

3. Koreans are already putting the next bite of food in their mouths before they finished chewing the last bit. oh.. i thought those r hokkien's customs?

4. Koreans use chopsticks for the side dishes but spoons for rice and soup. fusionized. when east meet west

5. If a Koreans suffer indigestion after meals, they treat it by pricking their fingers with needles. (This is an old folk remedy.) i tot u just smack the back area and u'll burp it all out?

6. Elderly Koreans often say, "Now that I've reached old age, I see every eyesore." (read: "My goodness, times have changed," "Where's the world heading?" etc.) ......malaysians go "When i was your age! a bowl of mee cost like 50 cents!"

7. Korean women often resort to hair-pulling when fighting. BORING.... malaysian girls use their high heels... or if not they push one another into the pool n then only pull each others hair...

8. When someone hits a subordinate, it is always on the head, and most often across the back of the head. if my boss hits me that way.... i'll @%#@$@^.. urmm stand there n let her hit la.....

9. The wealthy have contempt for those without, and those on the lower rungs kiss the feet of their superiors. Korean society treats the wealthy and the poor completely differently. feet kissing? that's so dynasty era like....

10. If you go into a house you must take off your shoes. so does most asians i guess...

11. After sleeping, the blankets and pillows go in the closet. If Koreans go into a room, they always shut the windows and doors. any reason why the blankies and pillows go in the closet? abit troublesome to have to rearrange it everyday b4 n after u sleep right? i sleep my windows n doors when i sleep to? anything wrong with that?

12. Many marriages are arranged for expediency or convenience. maybe not now.. but in a few year times? maybe i won't mind such custom.... ;P

Source: englishnews@chosun.com http://english.chosun.com/w21data/html/news/200609/200609180026.html

Ducks in the City

2006-09-18T14:36:00.000+08:00

Mama duck and her 6 little ducklings decided to go for a walk in the city

She was told in the city u cross a road when u see zebra crossings....

She wasn't told there's a minimum size limit to that...

Now she's left with only a duckling......................

The Back Dimples

2006-08-28T13:36:00.000+08:00

Was at Laundry@Curve last weekend for the football match and some girl watchin. Lately, that place seems to the be jam packed almost daily. Quite happening and plenty of cute hotties around. I was with Ben and some other frens chillin when Ben suddenly mentioned about the 2 holes on the back of this gal that walked by. quite a turn on and it's so damn hott! I look at it.. and thought the same too :P~~

I got home and went searching for the name of the 2 cute holes and found couple of names for it. Some call it the back dimple. Some named it butt dimples @ bumples, and Wikipedia calls it "Dimples of Venus".

WTF is it u ask?

See the two holes where the tattoo is in between of? Well that's the Venus hole... Not all girls are blessed with it la. just like dimples on the cheek that add cuteness to the area where it's located. Butt Dimples are the interesting little indentations in the lower back, just above the butt. Usually girls with low cut jeans flaunt it as some sorta butt accesory.

Even better if it was just panties..... with mickey mouse picture on it.. (lagi best if it's cotton panty)

Anyway, looking at the above picture made me think on further... every part of a human body is created for some reason. Where can we go with this two cute little holes. Then it hit me.. Thumb grooves!

hmmmm....

Yes! see that two holes at the back.. that's where u place ya two thumbs when u r doggie styling... The Dimple of Venus (as i've posted on Feb during the lunar new year); will surely compliment the final few months of the Year of the Dog.

Even though we see it quite regularly; i have not really taken serious notice of how good the two holes compliment a tight lookin butt. but NOW, I DO.........

Level UP : Sight of Venus (+1 Strength +1 Vision)

Level UP : Doggie Style (-1 Difficulty)

fuck3d......

2006-08-14T14:18:00.000+08:00

Last weekend i was lazin around feeling sick and all.. not planning to go out.. bout 8 plus ben called and asked if i wanted to go to loft.. i said ok la since no one else called to do anything. Got ready at 9.30 and ben came pick me up.

We reach Loft at about 10+ and got to our tables n chill.. ben n i were chattin and then we saw these two girls at bar chatting... ben pretended to go to the bar to get some glasses and then like started a conversation with em. Japanese chicks! muahahaha

:) Invited them over to our table n we started talking n drinking. they were quite friendly girls though. Migo and Ika. later WK came join us and the crowd got bigger. we left at 3.00am and ben asked if the girls needed a ride to the hotel? they say they r staying in sheraton which is just opposite the place. not planning to let them go off so easily, i asked if they wanna go for a meal before going back. they agreed so we ended up at the stalls nearby havin supper.

upon eating, we walked them back to the hotel. as we reach there the say wanna drink some more. i say dun wan la. lazy to go back to the club.. they say order from hotel drink in their room la.. Ben looked at me.. canot see me... hahahah i went press the lift door to go up to the room de. on the way up already fantasizin de.. 4 kar mahjong.. never try before.. somemore first time play.. play japanese mahjong deeee.. hahahaha

got up to the room then ben said he wanted to go to the car to take ciggies. i called room service to order a jug of beer. asked if i could use their bathroom n went in to pee...... i heard ben came back and shortly i came out of the toilet..

those gurls looked angry and all. they accused one us of stealing their money and all... USD$600 fucked man.. then ben said he didn't take neither did i. at this time i know siong chea(naik kereta) de.. kena lou chin(con job) now. they asked us to return it and all or else they say wanna call the manager la.. call the police la...

ben big them back la.. say he father is a lawyer la.. wanna mess with him and this and that he not scared. he continue scaring them with stuff like his dad is some big shot datuk and this n that n they r messing with the wrong person. he even called the frontdesk to request that a manager came to the room.

suddenly they got afraid and all.. n said sorry they 'misplaced' the USD$600... i was fucking pissed man kena eat dead cat like that... fucking wanted to slap one of the girl. raised my hand and then ben grab my hand from the back n said "no!".....

"wakeeee up ahh! you're gonna b late for work today!" my mom said.....

Hmm...

2006-08-12T11:03:00.000+08:00

this morning, my boss' mom called the office. anyway sorta like family thing la.. no blood relation just close ties. Anyway i call her porpor. she called when i was away. when i came back to office, i returned her call

Me : Hello porpor u call me?

Por2 : You just c

ame back to office?
ME : yes ah. is there anything you need me to do? *expecting her to ask me to drive around to fetch things for her*
Por2 : Oh no la.. how are you lately?
Me : Urmm... goood.. *geetin weird*
Por2 : Busy pak toring ah?
Me : No laaa por por... gf also dun have how to pak tor.
Por2 : OHH ! really????????
Me : yah lor. where got time la. now everyday busy with work
Por2: you know right
Me : uhuh...
Por2 : por por know this good gal ahhh to introduce to u! she's a graduate and does accounts one.
Me : HAAAAAH? *finally the real reason for the call*
Por2 : she's from good family.. i arrange one day we go for lunch together ok?
Me : PU YAO LA!!!! so lou tou(oldfashion) i don't want.... (really.....)
Por2 : aiyahhhhh nm laaa.. just be friends laaaa nothing onee
Me : pu yao...
Por2 : yaoo laa.. i arrange time.. don't worry won't arrange at our restaurants one... no one will know....
Me : no need la..
Por2 : when i arrange de i tell u the time then you come ok... bubybe. *click*
Me : por por??
Me : por porrrrrrrrrr?

....... no chance to even say no.. anyway not first time de. must tell people i got gf de. cass? ting? ling? steffi? wanna come to one of those family dinner with me?

Mouse Party at MH's

2006-08-07T14:22:00.000+08:00

Last weekend got invited over to MH's place for a little gathering. his parents were away and so we went over for a small drinking party. Sat around talk cock, drink , played, dai wah sik) and some childhood reflection thingy...

We were talking bout cartoons in our younger days and someone brought up Care Bears... MH excused himself and came out with his sister who's got tis two cute bears. Cheer Bear which is the green one and Wish Bear the pinky.

They look like normal care bears but they are fucking link in someway.. bluetooth? infrared? within 5 meters distance. if u press a button they start talking to each other.. "hello i'm wish bear" then the other "hi wishbear, i'm cheer bear"...When you squeeze its hand the bears talk and sing to you, and moves their heads. then pause and the other bear will answer and then back to the other and it'll go "Lets sing a song" n both of them like do a kiddyacapella ok.... wahh damn cool....

If you are planning to lum ya girls... go get one for em... then next birthday get another.. i heard they got 5 of em bears... now.... that's like gonna save u alot of trouble in finding gifts.. every birthday just get different care bears for her... :)

Check this place out for more bears.. there's ilke 37 different bears. wonder if can link all 37 together.. hahaha can like start a choir de.... :) Care Bears Plush . To imagine how cool it is.. imagine cass.. imagine her clapping to the song .. "If you're happy and you know it" that's how cool it is...

Adult love vs Kiddy love

2006-07-31T14:01:00.000+08:00

WB's in this relationship for like 1 year now.. his chick is some cute 22 year old college gal which i think is pretty neat... i mean... u know la the young fresh n all.. fat old men like me can only dream of having some hot college gal gf.

young, cute and hot...that was what i use to believe....

until we notice a change in Ben... he's like got this PMS thing going on every week. and we soon found out that they argue like every alternate day and every week there'll b one major event... other than the fantastic sex.. u know laa... young and energetic young thing..... not all has been sweet for him.

anyway everytime they argue i would b like the person he drags to this taman to fag n just listen to him whine about her... i told him not happy just break up la.... but then usually he tell me break up de.. this time for real.. and usually the only thing for real is them patching up again.. so can continue arguing and continue breaking up the following week.

C H I L D I S H

to think about it, she seems more like a liability to him. other than great sex.... :P~ what else can she give him as someone's who's part of him.... but then it's all WB's fault also la... need to learn to cut it off...

canot so sam luin...

Sometime back at some bar....

me : eh ben chow de.. i think argue with gf.. going back to keng sou and all..
dragon : hah? again?
me : aiyah all the time la...
dragon : i duno why they pak tor until like that.... last time the only time i argue with gf(now wife) was when she make me wear condom..... which u know is so not me....
me : was that how u got married??
dragon : %&*#^

Wah.... it's getting more and more exciting......

2006-07-28T14:07:00.000+08:00

*Update*

I'm pretty sure all over the papers tomorrow this will be the picture they show.. currently being posted at the star

However, i think it's another plot to belittle this poor old man....

They think it might make him look old and weak.. but then... check out his speech at Kelantan TV abit ke lian to see someone who's contributed so much to the country being treated this way. even if he has different political view as you or me, this is not a way to treat the elderly...

Picture from kmu.net of TDM seconds after he got sprayed with what was believed as tear gas

wah this is getting more and more exciting... the fighthing now between the two powerhouse in malaysian politics has now reach new heights. u don't know what is real anymore. i've read couple of blogss on this and honestly, not sure what to believe. is it real or just staged? kinda reminds us of taiwanese politics where it's all controlled by the triads. dolah might wanna try shooting himself on the fingernail or something to gain back rakyat's sympathy.............

also read that the internet line in Kelantan is all dead noon today. some political blogs/website has also been hacked into to stop it from reporting the visit by TDM.... neccesary? do u need to do all this to stop a 80 year old man?

anyway like samy vellu and some other retired circus animals running the country.... i'll just sit and watch...

whoever win also.. what will it guarantee us?

The "Minor"ity Repoty....

2006-07-22T15:30:00.000+08:00

when a durian, betik, manggis, langsat and duku argues with each other. it's not not racism. if u have 50 Limau's, mocking and yelling at 6 Mandarin oranges. tat's racism. Doesn't matter if it's politically or racialy motivated, this is not something that should b happening in higher education units.

it should b looked into. the big ass guard dog that kept yelling 'beellaahh' should b tied to a chain incase he gets loose again. oh.. incase he's a student? then i think the Uni can offer him a job as bouncer or something... use his wages as uni fees instead of using us taxpayers money to raise this bunch of baruahs....

How do we

2006-07-22T10:39:00.000+08:00

How do we survive.....

A forwarded email which got me thinking abit about life.. and marriage.. and kids. etc....
I think i wanna die single.. probably could better afford a couple of fastfood meals a month than to get marry with kids n all.... sigh....

Let's to do some calculations here. In Malaysia the average family income is RM3,000 (Father works, mother doesn't). I understand there are a lot of families whose income don't reach RM3,000, but to make things simple, lets take RM3,000 as the figure. Okay, let's start rolling with a family which has Papa, Mama, 1 daughter and 1 son. ngam ngam.... Calculation starts..... Electricity and water bilsl RM100 (no air-cond, no home theatre, no water heater ok?)

Telekom and Handphone bills RM100 (cannot make a lot of calls one you know? NO Streamyx also)

Meal for the whole happy family, RM775 (3 meals on RM25/day, RM25 for 4 persons????)

Papa makan/teh tarik during working hours RM155 (RM5/day, RM5 can eat what?Damn ke lian de ok....)

Car repayment RM400 (a Proton Saga Aeroback, 7 years' repayment and min downpayment....)

Petrol RM300 (Living in City with traffic jam not yet count pay to samy velu and packing somemore). Go to work, bring son to school, only can afford one car running.

Insurance RM650, (kids, wife and myself.. but then poor people will opt this out.. can't afford this when u don't even have enough to feed the mouth).

House repayment RM750 (Low cost housing repayment for 30 years, retired still have to work to pay house!)

Tuition RM80 (got that cheap meh?? No lah, I don't think so)

Older children pocket money @ school RM20 (RM1/day, eat bread ke ..??)

School fees RM30 (enough huh?? this one not yet count college/uni)

School books and etc etc. RM100 (always got extra to pay in school ... ??)

Baby/younger children milk powder RM50 (cannot have the DHA, BHA, PHA one, expensive lah !!)

Miscellaneous RM100 (shampoo, rice, sauce, toilet paper & etc.)

oh wait!!! I have to stop here, so... No Astro, no movie @ cinema, no DVD, no CD, no online, cannot go for KFC, cannot eat Mc Donald, cannot go Park walking during weekend (petrol expensive), no chit chat on phone with grandparents and etc...

Let's use a calculator to total up... WALAO EI.. Shit! RM3,610 already...

EPF belum potong, Income Tax lagi, ........ oledi --- RM610... How to survive laa. Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan sekalian???

Our Deputy Prime Minister ask us to change lifestyle? How to change? Don't eat? Don't work? Don't send children to school and study? Besides that, I believe in Malaysia population, there are millions of Rakyat Malaysia which still don't earn RM3,000/month!!!

What is this? Ini lah Malaysia Boleh.. Sorry.. it should be Malaysians Boleh, because we're still alive and kicking!!

So seee..... it's not easy getting married and all.. kids... wah la.. i don't know how some of u guys do it. with my current lifestlye.. totally no way.

Anyway congrats.. (urm?) to a good friend whois getting marry this coming September 24. Good luck my friend.........

No more McDonalds for u mr married man......

Drunken Who????

2006-07-14T00:59:00.000+08:00

Jackie Chan... all his life he's been potrayed as this hard working dare devil who's entertained us with his funny moves and deathifying(sp?) stunts.

Gettin carried away from one of his movies, "drunken master", he mess up a concert of this taiwanese songwritter when jackie was invited there as a guest.

he got up the stage. did some kung fu moves

demanded that he wants to sing the duet song from the movie "the myth" and the guy gotta do the female part and alll :O

When the music played, instead; he started mumbling some drunken language. it was rumoured he was singing in hokkie' the 1 million song (chi pakk ban)... the fans didn't like it and started boo'ing him... he then sang another hokkie song.. the "chi pueh chiew-andy lau" song which i am not sure what the tittle is... fans got pissed n the whole hall was jeering him n all... then jackie...

Pointed at the fans and finished up with "Wa Si Sie Geh Teh Yit Chim!"(I am No 1 in the world)

DISCLAIMER - the above is only 80% true ....

Jackie however, did get drunk n mess up Jon Lee's concert. He went on stage thinkin he was some maestro. demanded a duet. then when fans started to boo.. he threw quite some vulgarity at the crowd.

but right, I think he's like me... he just dun like to see happy happy couples...... doing happy happy things... that's why he was at the concert alone. that's why he was drinking badly... assumed he was there alone. if not he/she would have stopped him right?

maybe someday can bump into him at mizu during happy hour.... and happi happi eat kuachi together :)

why right............

2006-07-13T12:04:00.000+08:00

when u go into a lift... and the buzzer goes off... like

*peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeert*

all fuckings eyes will turn to the poor fat boy, even if he's standing right inside the back of the life.. shouldn't people b staring at the last person in? don't u think this is like some sorta discrimination towards fei jais?

anyway... if u fart inside the lift or something... it's alwiz easier to go on the offensive and point at someone else before they trackback the smell to u... even if u didn't, having so many eyes glaring at u for poluting the lift air circulation, it's kinda hard to explain when under such pressure.

I know...........

2006-07-12T11:38:00.000+08:00

i've been away for sometime time... am on the road mostly not the 9-5 deskjob thing already. and exactly at 5... i'll b somewhere happy hour'ing.

mostly at the uptown pubs as my house is just around walking distance. i tried doing other things other then drinking.. like getting frens for dinner... hanging out at shopping complexes. but then it got quite depressing being in such happy happy places.

we walk walk around 1U.... see lots of cun chicks and all.. but then after looking for a while... just sien de... mostly see couple holding hands.. mushy mushy... lap here lap there.... wah so lor man... and then we start commmenting on why the guy so ugly also got some cun gf and all...... we not that char also.. all our hands can get hold of it our own balls.... why life so unfair.... why people so happyy... and we r so... why............. why.....

then suddenly... feel lonely.... why all got gf... and i'm still like......

after some downtime.... someone would suddenly say....

"hey! lets go to Mizu for a drink!, got mimi and elsa there!"

yipeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

come lets go drinking.........at least in pubs u dun find couples doing all those thing they do in complexes n feel depress about it.. i don't like to seee happy happy couples... i don't like to see happpy happy things... i guess that's why a pub suits me more. at least in there i can watch astro , eat my kuachi and drink my beer without having to feel bad about being lonely..... cuz i can easily say almost all in a pub are lonely people!

if u've got a loving, caring and hot wife/gf at home.. u fucking wouldn't need to be in the pub right? :)

Some new workout gadget

2006-06-14T13:58:00.000+08:00

Guess which muscles you work out with this equipment?

Found this picture courtesy of Winnie

this equipment works out surely more musles than the iGallop thingy which i think is so full of shit.

Must be the alcohol....

2006-06-09T14:47:00.000+08:00

Last nite got home at 1am... abit high... from drinking with dragon, ET and Kelvin.

Anyway i believe i was sober already when i got home and all. cuz i still manage to go online fixed some excel forms for work. and then found cassie on MSN....

Wanting her attention i msg'ed Tingting and Cassie

"I took a nude picture of myself"

Instantly both of em replied... not bad for a conversation starter huh? they were asking if i really did it.. well of course not....

anyway ting got disconnected for some unknown reason. was talking to cassie n i tangan gatal go click on her webcam. was talking to her when i saw someone walking pass behind her.. assumed one of her underage sisters so i went

"cassie say hi to that sister of yours that just walk pass"

seconds later.... the sister walk past her again...

i told cass "casss faster say hi to her"

her reply was "don't b stupid!"

alwiz kacau her sisters... so she know not to be bothered. anyway i was expecting the "don't be stupid" but not this....

"No one is home now.... what are u talking about?"

.................. sei la... chong kwai?

must be the alcohol........................ must b the alcohol.... shit... i'm not using webcams no more..

Sometimes... it's not the men's fault.........

2006-06-02T13:44:00.000+08:00

Someday if ya men, bf, husband or other half cheats on u............. blame it on their upbringing ok....

i guess it just not something u get to kick away that easily. from young we are brought up to worship the boobs.... *chuit*chuit* i mean........... welll ermm nm...

Look at how intensely the baby stare at the tits... if someday u notice me looking at ya boobs.... well fucking don't blame me cuz i too; was breastfed when little.......

How to handle escaped zoo animals

2006-06-01T15:33:00.001+08:00

Remember a year or so back when the tiger cub which was given to the zoo lost the cub? it's really not suprising. as there's no backup plan or action plan on how to track n recapture such animals it usually take days or weeks to find back the escapee. however this is not the same in some part of the world. they have procedures on how to handle animals who's got off from their cages and they do mock exercise to be ready for such events.

S O P(standard operating procedure) in recapturing escaped zoo animals

When a lion escape cuz some zookeeper forgot to put on the latch or left the keys in the cages...

1 - Block off all escape route

2 - Send in the sharp shooter (preferable in a camo-flush; zebra stripes vehicle)

3 - Lion surrenders

4 - Safely return the lion or animal into it's cage. Just make sure u sack the careless zookeeper.

Anyway, it not difficult to find all the above but then, maybe in malaysia it's a bit more difficult to get a volunteer to dress up in some silly lion king costume... but then... probably that's why we'll never be as efficient as the yapun jais.....

Malaysia... Boleh kua.....

16-hours TM Net Interaction Centre

2006-05-24T01:53:00.000+08:00

Quoted from TMnuts webpage

"Customers can call the 24-hour TM Net Customer Interaction Centre at 1-300-88-9515 or 1-300-88-1515 from 8:00 a.m. till midnight or email at custcare@tm.net.my for further enquiries about the service."

Well.... since when is being open 8am till 12 midnite = 24 hours?? they had problem fixing ya technical issues, it figures as they can't even count.. it's 16-hours TM Net Interaction Centre

Bitccccccch............ even if 24 hours is meant for emails... there's no one working between 12 midnite till 8 am... what's 24-hour??

grr.......... connection is so so so slow.....

I've got an idea...

2006-05-10T04:40:00.000+08:00

for Saint..... if she or any of the chi muis are reading this..........

As one of the obstacles to be completed before opening the door n letting the groom in... First give Saint a BB Gun or a Bow(even better yeah! the one for shooting a real arrow....real gun would have the best effect though) Get Terry... to walk away about 10 meters(the further the better of course) holding a target board(dart board would do too).......

and Saint get a shot at the target board...........

Like this...........

My apologies for the PS quality.. My photoshop skill is close to nothing...

Something to think about...

2006-05-07T04:00:00.000+08:00

a script off CSI Season 6 Episode 21 (Rashomama)

Grissom: Did you know the original role of the bridesmaid was to act as a human shield against the bride's enemies?

Sara: Women would dress similar to the bride in an effort to confuse and outsmart evil spirits that might try to overtake the bride on her wedding day.

I've volunteered myself to join terry for his heng tai convoy up to ipoh this coming thursday to do the chip san leong shit........... i'm thinking of being the evil spirit.. and kidnap Saint's chi muis mistakenly..well, on purpose maybe..................................

Sorry.. AWOL

2006-04-26T16:45:00.000+08:00

i've been putting 7 days and close to 12 hours work aday for the last 4 weeks.... no time to hang about with the mo liew friends.. no time to really sit down n think of what to write... hopefully it'll get back to normal soon..

till then... will make sure i leave something behind that will have u remember me everytime you shave or look at ya armpits :)

*muah*

annoymous : wahh shiang!! the chic armpit damn smooth la.. fuckk.. turn on de........

well yeah :) i know what u mean.....................

what about this then?

this is not my stlye though.........

p/s if u feel offended looking at nipples... urmm.. welll.. tooo late

UPDATE : See i learn something new today... the above is Chau Ah Kua!!!! fuck.. urmm why??.....

★ cassandra says:
we are real ladies... real ladies no armpit hair wan

What do u think?

2006-03-30T01:46:00.000+08:00

Of two hot girls kissing? sonnnnnggggg leh :)

hehehehe but then i canot swallow the tot of 2 guys kissing in ang lee's movie. i dunno laaa.. if u have two beautiful thing kissing... it looks good.. if u have to strong thing kissing.. it's just not right..

anyway i've asked around on what do some of u girls think about 2 gals kissing and if u ever have done it b4.. surpisingly... most of u have done it... hahahaha the only

"eeeeeeeeeee ya!" was from a 13 year old... and...

"yuckssss" was from this 21 year old.....

rest of the older ladies i have asked have tried it at least once and some even had pictures of it... which i however fail to persuade them to send to me..... fucking msn should allow you to fucking steal someone else messnger's photo.. shit man..... if not can share with ya all here......

compare this

:P~~~~~~~~~

To this......................

*yucks*

Anyway i damn ON when see pictures of sweet young things kissing.... urmm if u people got any more pictures of hot chics kissing.. send it to me. n we can share it here :) hehehehe

Anyway for this week :) hope you enjoy this.....

Urmmm... use ya magnifyin glass if canot see.. or u could help me by teachin me how to enlarge a gif animated file........ if not don't complain.....

Enjoy :)

More feel good pictures....

2006-03-24T11:47:00.000+08:00

Well about 2 weeks back i've posted some feel good pictures. but then mostly it's for the guys la... i'm not sure how turn on you girls get seeing those pictures.

Anyway today let me enlighten you with another feel good picture....

FeiJais orgy :)

Anyway last weekend's Mouse Party at Cass' place got me pretty drunk. (More pictures of the party at Celeste and Steff's blog)but then before i was drunk.. i was rather turn on..... and no.. it wasn't cass' little underage sisters..... it's the massage chair... how turn on? urmm.......

damn songggggg :)

LV LV LV LV LV

2006-03-16T12:21:00.000+08:00

Just a follow up on my previous post regarding this guy who's attempted suicide cuz the wife couldn't stop buying expensive stuff to keep up with the other tai tais.... it kinda made me curious so i asked around about what people think of it.

Most of em when talked about branded stuff for a lady. LV would be the first that comes out of their mouth.

I was talkin to Wika last nite about the same thing :) she's a proud owners of an LV. n i was asking her why she so seh tak buy something which is not really worth that price at all.. her answer was that sometimes when u work so hard. end of the day u just wanna spoil yaself and sometimes buying yaself something nice i.e. a LV handbag would just sum up a hard day of work.....

that did not really answer my curiousity on how come girls.. being as calculative as they are. think something like that is worth it. as for me.... i would rather spend like $4500 on something like this

A nice comfortable leather sofa where i can have sex on than a tiny little handbag which does not consist at least 10% of the leather use to make the sofa.

Hmmmmmmm...to the girls... think about it.. would u like pay $600 for this.....

Or pay $3000 for this

Hmm.... knowing girls... and pigs..... they probably would not be able to decide yet. for the si lais... wah big pig can cook yummy bak kut tehs........ LV piglets makes yummy designer suckling pig. but then big pig would feed at least 10 times the amount of people compared to what the piglet could do...

anyway i very very sure paris hilton will go for the LV tattoo'ed pigs :)

If you are planning to kill yaself.....

2006-03-15T16:34:00.000+08:00

Please read further............

Yesterday afternoon, during one of the afterwork coffee shop talk cock session we were talking about the economy n all... and then ET pointed out on the newspaper bout this gal jumpin off her school building cuz of her results and broke some bones and all but not died...

Suddenly Dragon gave us this smirk..............

I mah ask la why smile like that?

Dragon told us he's got a friend, more of a friend of his brother. 2 days ago. Attempted suicide. His(Lets call him X) reason for ending his life was because of debts all over. not due to his sins. more of his wife's inablity to control her shopping spree.

We laughed... but then Dragon say it's really true. Wife's after all those branded shit that X had to resolve to borrowing from friends at the beginning... n then taking loans off big2holes to supplement the wife's habit.

Prior to killing himself... he wrote his suicide note... one to his wife. telling her how much he loved her but despised the way she spend. he also mention some shit like how useless he is cuz he could never say no whenever the wife asked him for money for all her shopping habits

He also emailed his mom a note saying thank you for the care etc.... etc.. la...

On nite he attempted suicide.. he swollowed like 65+ panadols....

the next morning his mom was at office n checked her email to find the suicide note she rushed to X's house. X's wife was away for a couple of days so she wasn't around. going into the house... they found X groaning on the ground..

Mom slapped him a couple of times to wake him up... dood was all stonned in pain and all....

they took him to the nearby hospital instantly....

upon reaching D'sara Medical Center... they put him into the emergency unit.... the moment they heard that he swollowed panadols to kill himself.. they asked for him to be transfered and sent to another hospital.

fucking hospital don't take suicide patients.

so they moved him to a govt hospital. UM. reach UM only........ have to wait... anyway X was being stablize already at the previous medical center. i guess they'll probably make sure u r not in some critical situation before sending u off. X however have all this tubes all over his body...

At UM, thinking he'll get immediet attention.... he's wrong. he's gotta like wait in line with all the other emergency ward patients... dood have all those tubes stuck in his body which was painful for like 45 mins before he got admited and had his stomach cleaned.

anyway dragon said last he heard about X's condition is he's ok de. just that some part of the stomach n intenstine's damaged.

Anywayyyyyy.............. for any of u who's tot of suiciding... just remember. detol works better than panadol :)

Chun "wat the fuck right? why not just drink detol?"

Me " fucker u think detol so easy to drink ah?"

Chun " not nice mah buy one bottle of coke as mixer la!!! if not green tea also can"

Me " ??????"

Oh and remember.. if u ever attempt to take ya life.. and don't die.. forget about going to private hospitals... go directly to goverment hospitals..... if u don't wanna wait 45 minutes to be treated.. then go to a private hospital n tell them u were drunk n all.. n accidently swollowed 65 panadols.... or u thought the bottle of detol was Chivas.................

On another note...

2006-03-13T11:26:00.000+08:00

My appologies for the ramblings in the previous post. I think abit too much for some... Lets just look at some 'feelgood' photos i rip off others site.

Feel better now?

The spread lips... the dreamy eyes... wah damn feel good la :)

What to do What to do

2006-03-11T10:02:00.000+08:00

Recently with things in life being so difficult, i was just lazin around thinking n did some self reflection on how it would b in coming years.

i've thought about venturing into some sorta business but then with the state of our current economy, u wanna sell what also die. oh can sell one thing.. sell salty duck egg(mai hum ngap tan)... but then hoh, that business u earn hell money... so u can only spend it there.... i'm not there yet so that option is out.

this is not another posting of the 30 cents petrol hike. it's a posting of everything also hike. but economy still down there.... no not down there sucking my balls. just down there not doing nothing. if go on like this.... like russian roullete only. seee who die first la...... Indo, thai and phili has all gone through it. malaysia next?

go through what u asked? go through the period of time where killings have to happen to put food into mouth. where bloodshed gotta happen for changes to be made. not here in malaysia u say? true la.. maybe not. but that doesn't mean it might not ever happen.

I'm a CHINESE. i was brought up in this world to think in a way. that if things don't work out here. move somewhere else. NEVER fight with money. that's how the chinese(as in those from china's) and indian(from india la) have been doing for decades. things were not good for them many many years ago back in their homeland. what they did?

movee la! all over the world now u find successful chinamen and their chinatowns and indian selling their chicken massala to kwai lous. so now. with things not looking good... your only chance is to find a better place.

in this world if you are hardworking. whatever u do u'll b succesfull... but not here.. not when u r Suria KLCC up against the Twin Towers......

what do u do??

MOVE LA!

to somewhere where things are better.

somewhere where they treat us all alike.

somewhere where the grass is not as green as home; but stilll... u r allowed to step on it without having to accquire any kinda son of earth(soe) tittle

Country's petroleum company make loads of $$$. all this are oil generated from our own country. All this money are generated back to the development. Mostly for the soe's. they get helped. while we non-soe's suffer from petrol hike. suffer from the rise in neccesicities. suffer from many many other things. we use to be able to cope even when the playing ground was not level. but at the rate things are going. survival is even a problem. not to mention raising up kids and all............

smart n rich people all go de. they find homes in Australia, New Zealand and UKs..... u alwiz see papers printing about successful malaysians everywhere.... YOU Could be one! yes YOU! malaysian youngest phd, successfull chain char kueh teow outlet in the States, billionaire developer in China or even Pop idol in Australia!

what's left are us; not so smart and 'cannot really afford to move ya whole family' group, stuck in this place we call home but not treated as a family. what can you do u ask?

Move la!!

where? somewhere cheaper?

Motherland!

Wo Sen, Jai Zhi Li...

Jai, Jai Zhi Li............

Zhi Li Si Pu Si Wo De Guo Jia..............?

p/s Check out Malaysians Abroad. If they could do it. Why not YOU!

Stanley's Birthday @ RB Curve

2006-03-10T14:56:00.000+08:00

About 2 weekends ago, Stanley have this smart idea of celebrating his birthday on a Sunday afternoon. we went sing K at Redbox@Curve from 2pm to 5pm. his reasons for having it in the afternoon.

1) Day time not so many people will make it
2) Less tooi'ing each other
3) after singing can go have a happy meal @ dinner together.

What happened...

1) he asked 6 people. 7 person showed up.
2) at 5.30pm.. couple of us were drunk already... somehwere high up there. happy hour beer is $32 bucks. not cheap but then compared to other times it's still cheaper.
3) hahahah high de how to eat... all go home n sleep lor....

Quote of the day Cass " FUCK YOU ALL! Fuck you shiang! y'all drink like girlsss! come on.. bottoms up la!!!!!"

that's why we all love cass.......... :)

Someday.....

2006-03-02T14:02:00.000+08:00

on the day i get marry, I'll remember to stock up toilet rolls, instant noodles and milk in the fridge......

Either that or someone forgot to tell her marriage life is all about sex without condoms and pills.. those things she's carrying could just be a decoy in buying the pack of condom.

Where did it go wrong

2006-02-28T11:10:00.000+08:00

few weeks back.... 4 of us were playing rummy at Ceasars Club. Eric, Jeff, Ben and I.

Since the game is played with mahjong tiles. the game is kinda noisy. n usually, when important/work call comes... we will automatically... go

"shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" then close the room door n only answer the phone.

As we were playing song-song.... Ben's phone rang. he's got 2 phones; one is for work and one is personal. we saw the personal phone ringing. so just continue playing thinkin it was one of our other friends.. Ben looked at the caller ID.. jump up.. closed the door(cuz there r other rooms playing too), and then ask us to "SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"lim peh geh char boh....(my women) " he said....

we all stop for a while la... u know la.. guys do things all very cooperative one.. hahahaha oh... trust me girls.... all ya bf do the same too ok.... maybe not while playing mahjong... probably doing something they love but u r not that fond off....

ben answered the call " yeah what?"

...............................she said

ben "no la i just finish work. now driving"

.........................................she said

ben "LDP laaa coming back soon la... i pick u up for dinner later u kwai kwai wait for me la"

.............................she said

ben "of course quiet la i never on the radio mah.............."

*jeff started humming some silly song*

..................she said

ben "dunn ask so muccchh laaaa... reaching home shortly la cannot talk so much la driving now!"

.........................................she said

ben "ok ok ok!!!!! lasst game laaa... i go home after this game la...."

we all went " huuhhhh????"... then we burst out laffing.....

ben while looking somewhere else "Yes laaaa... playing rummy for a while they all not enuf people they ask join them laaa... coming home deee.. u wait laaaa very fast one"

............................she said

ben " i already say coming home de !!! why u say so much someomreee" *tone starting to change*

.........................

ben "whatever la! think what you want... " *hangs up*

hearing that we all mah say ok laa last game.... then go off de la since ben have to go

Ben " fuck her la dun bother la.... women cannot spoil her one la... everyday spend time with her now come up with my frens a while also bising de... don't bother la. we continue playing"

everyone.. "oh.. ok"

just a game after that.....

ben " urmm.. eh last game la.. hungry de.. i think i should go back for dinner... "

eric just to cha him " eh i thought u having dinner with us?"

ben " not today la.. later call u guys yum cha ok. ok ?"

Ni ren si sui chor de @ Women are made of water
Nan ren si moo chor de @ Men are made of kayu....

that's why so stupid kua.................

My First time

2006-02-17T15:34:00.000+08:00

On the lrt.... damn paiseh....

Last sunday suppose to be a quiet one for me. woke up at noon went for lunch and got 2 copies of newspapers n head towards Stabak to meet Stanley. just got there about 30 mins then suddenly phone rang. boss called...

"Ah HO!! KLCC outlet the premium gifts finishing de. can come to my house and help me wrap then send to klcc?"

"fuck offf laa it's my sunday and i deserve a break!" well of course i didn' say that

"sure. give me 30 mins.. i'll leave shortly.." was what i actually said... i'm such a weakling.... :

got to her house have everything packed n then she told me kl alot of road closure. better idea to take the lrt... like 5 seconds after she said that... sky turned all black and it started pouring. huge assload of water started falling from the sky.

damn. no choice but lrt... grab the paper bag with all those tiny boxes of gifts in it. grab an umbrella n i head off to the lrt station. as i reach the Kelana jaya station, i was already all wet.. walk to the platform with water drippin off my butt n all... must protect the paper bag at all cost......

as i was walking this guy in front of me started running.. then i also run la chase him... heard the sound of some train arriving. people run i also run.. u know laa mix too much with hokkies i also abit kiasu de. since kelana jaya station was the last station i assumed any train also jadi la. so never bothered to read the eletronic signboards. the guy got into the coach i just follow also la.. sat down... was cleaning/drying myself.. the guy i folllowed was seated opposite me

we started takling... how bad weather was n all.. then suddenly someone yelled

"oooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ini coach tak jalan la!!! sila keluar"

pick up my thing slowly n was walking out then suddenly the sound came

"BEEEP BEEEEP BEEE"

FUCKER said "SILA keluar" it means "TAKE YA TIME and PLEASE come out".. it should have been "CEPAT KELUAR!"

door was sliding to close... i tot like MacGyver... slip through the closing door... i forgot la.. this year i'm 29 de.. tummy size when i was 18 and now 2 different category... half of me and one hand holding the umbrella slip out while the other half body with my other hand holding the paper bag still inside the train

"KAPIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK"

fuck...

kena kepit.. everyone look...

girls were giggling....

men were trying not to look suprise....

kids were trying to get their parents to look at me....

then "beeep beeep beeep" the door open back....

the operator/staff look at me n said "ehh besar panjang pergi sekolah tinggi tinggi.. baca la sign board!"(you big and long; go school high high! learn to read the signboard la)

walk to one corner... wanted to jump down the track and eletrocute myself and alll..... but then i remember... got things to send to klcc..... cancel plan n went klcc n got the things delivered... wah there many many hot chickies :P~~~~ .... suddenly dun feel like dying de.....

well my car was parked at the lrt station... decided to take a cab back to the lrt station... fucking what's 20 bucks compared to doing something that stupid again......

KE AI or PEN TAN.... you say leh?

He's DA Man!

2006-02-14T14:10:00.000+08:00

After an attempt at Superwoman

Here he is again with something crazier!

Who are we speaking off?

Our one and only KY @ Kar Yeong

To read more about what the fuck he did; click <-------HERE------->

My Hokkien Attempt

2006-02-08T11:06:00.000+08:00

When i was working in Klang few years back. It's also a beginning for me speaking Hokkien. Practically everyone there speaks hokkien to me; if not, abit of mandarin so i could understand. not that it's much of a problem to me cuz i do understand hokkien; which i learn from the penang kias when i was hanging out with em during my Uni days. problem comes when i need to susun ayat to reply to em. no kata penghubung, no grammar no nothing. broken hokkien la practically. but still i manage to get the msgs across. wasn't that bad.

however klang hokkien abit chia lat one. a bit chor lor is how i would usually describe it. they go around lim peh this lim peh that... even if it wasn't vulgar; it does sound like it. i have friends in penang or even johor that can swear or scold you having you think it's some sorta compliments. it rhymes so well you feel goood even after kena taruh by em.

anyway my best hokkien moment happened at some coffee shop during lunch with a few colleagues.

Me : ehh who want chicken rice?
*noisy*noisy*
Me : huh? wee lu ai keh ph'eng? (wee, you want chicken rice?)
Wee : mai..
Me : ok....

So i went order my chicken rice la. 5 mins later it came.... song song eat my chic rice. everyone's food came.. except for wee's. then wee kept staring at me. never say anything also. i thought he wanted my kai pei.

Me : eh lu order ha mik?
Wee : wa? i thought u order for me
Me : lu gong lu mai mah....
Wee : wa mai keh ph'eng mah.
Me : yah la. then order what for you?
Wee : i want Chicken rice la. don't wanna add rice....
Me : oh...... *runs off to order another chicken rice*

From then onwards it's KUEH PH'ENG @ KWEH PH'ENG

LIM PEH KAR LU KONG

WA SI SEE GEH DEH YIT TIN!

Gong Xi Fa Chai.....

2006-02-03T14:32:00.000+08:00

My CNY celebration came early...

on the 25th of January,

Choy San @ God of Fortune walk pass my house. HE look see look see... HE thought to himself, "WAHHH this house got a cute golden retriever. "

"since this is the year of dog, i shall shower the owner with fortune." HE said....

HE walks to the house... *DING DONG*...

HE tries again *DING DONG*

*DING DONG* as he give a final try....

No one opens the door......... and he left.....................

KNNCCBMCH.........

p/s if you don't get it. refer to this.

oh... forgot to wish tim... since choy san not with me already

i wish everyone

San Tai Kin hoong (In Good Health)

Loong Ma Ching San (As Fit as a Dragon and Horse)

WAH SI BEEH AM KAN MAN!

2006-01-26T10:27:00.000+08:00

Yesterday driving back from LDP got into an accident. was supppose to meet john and Kel for lunch. i wasn't rushing la just normal driving.. bumper to bumper jam at ldp.. as it has been this couple of days

Suddenly i heard *sqqqqeeeerkkkkk* BANG

then another BANG

n finally a third BANG and my car jolted..... i went FUCK

got down the car straight away swear at them

"POK KAAAAAAII TIM CHA CHEA GAH!"

4 cars pile... dunno lucky or unlucky la kena bang like this. good thing was i was the first car.. had the least impact so it only cracked my bumper abit.

they wanted to do a police report i just told them mine is minor forget bout it consider me unlucky.. so i left....

met kel told him about it and told him wanna go buy number but then we were already late for the lunch appointment. went makan then kel had to get some furnitures cuz he just moved back from being stationed in Bintulu sarawak for a year plus.. after that we went play snooker.. didn't notice the time.... time was then 7.30 already... too late to buy number so meet up later with some other frens for dinner

At nite when i got home.. got on msn n i was complaining and whinning to this fren about the accident. he asked me for my car number... i said 8132..

his reply.. " you must b fucking kidding right?"

my heart start pounding de... "no why?" i asked.....

then he gave me the link www.magnum4d.com

i clicked on it and

FUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKK

BE RIGHT BACK.......... let me go wack my head on the car bonet for the 59872596 times now......

The Experience

2006-01-22T01:08:00.000+08:00

Sat nite was suppose to be a quiet nite at Matrix with stan playing pool.

About 9.. as i just reach matrix, Dragon sms'ed.

"Come to B Palace.room no 303 now!"

Then i called him; "bintang palace?"

He "yeah! come join us we are here de..."

"no laaa where got money to go such place! easily 1k per person right?"

Dragon " Don't worry laa comee i'll take care of it"

"who else is there?" i asked

"just V... come join us quick" dragon hangs up....

tat got me pretty excited. first of all don't get me wrong. the only sin i'm worried about myself is gambling which i've stop for sometime now. if i am afraid of you judging who i am just cuz i've been to a night club. that's bull shit.

currently i'm not attached to anyone. therefore i'm not cheating. if i have gone to a night club n had fun with with chics there it doesn't mean my whole life i would spend doing such thing and b proud of it. fun not as in sleeping with em.. to think about it i can't afford to even get to see their boobs ;) furthermore havin me do anyhing sleazy.

anyway back to the story.....

i took a cab to KL as you should figure out now i hate driving to kl if i intend to get drunk; i take a cab. was suppose to shoot some pool with Stan n his fren Thomas. anyway i just couldn't resist the temptation of going to one of this places. FFK stan n i hop onto a taxi n StarHill it is...........

B Palace is located just behind starhill. it's one of the glamourous night clubs for the rich n famous. i was told that chics there were exceptionally pretty, well i found out they really were.
Walking into the entrance i had a Ah Char(guy in turban la) greet me "Lou Sai Foong yeng gong lum" wah pretty impressive...

As i got into the room Dragon was having his dinner......... yeahhh.. dinner in a night club. what the fuck right? hokkien mee, some tofu shit, har pang(prawn crackers), cha yuk(deep fried pork slices), and some shit i can't recall now.

then he called the siew yeh (this is the term used to refer to waiters in NCs) to get the mummy fo find me a companion

i sat quietly there trying not to look so excited. about 10 mins later, mummy came in followed by a gal. kinda tall... small eyes and quite pretty. she was wearing some fur jacket and i can't really describe how her figure was like. mummy said she's 18... i say dun believe.. she took out her IC. WTF? really 18..........

we were chatting for a while. no hanky panky stuff.. just chattin n drinking. then played some tai wah sik. one of the manager came in n join us playing the dice game. after a couple of drink.. i think May(tat was her name) got heated up. she took of her jacket.

FULAAAMAAK!

no need to explain further right? then i asked her

"what does a pretty young lady like u need to work here for?"

sensing i do not look up that highly of her profession she replied, " even though i come form quite a well off family. i don't spend a single cent of my family. to b honest i'm here for the money. all i do is just sit around n drink with u guys n i get $400 a nite....i drive a H Stream own a house and i'm quite happy with it. when customer gets drunk n start getting naughty. we just walk out of the room. i'm a gold fish......"

Gum Yee = tai tak mmm pok tak(for decoration only hahahaaha)

WTF right? i'm sure she's way richer than me or u.. thing is she's only 18........ WTF!

Anyway :P she went off for a while.. NO i did not grob her or anything.. i wanted to.. hahaha but then that wouldn't be nice... she went to the ladies.. finally had a chance to ask Dragon wat was the occasion la. why suddenly this place. he pointed at V

V showed me a tag on his left hand. "wtf? hospital tag?" i asked

that bastard got hospitalized for a broken arm was admited to a hospital and he sneak out to come here! hahahaha anyway NO!! he's not my fren.. one of dragon's sleazy friends ok! i don't have friends like that ok!

Later on V say he gotta sneak back into the hospital.. told us we could stay longer if we wanted to. n he asked for the bill.. $3700.... we had 2 bottles and 4 chics with us.. well.. V had 2. he paid for all of it n left....

Me and dragon? we sat for a while and then took a cab home..........

worth it?? fucking of course not!

p/s wika n anne sorry i couldn't make it to see ya guys....it was about 9 plus de and no one called up yet. so i went on with this plan. sorry

The Doggie Year

2006-01-20T10:33:00.000+08:00

This coming lunar new year would be for us; the chinese, celebrating the year of a dog.

Before we proceed further, let us first bid farewell to the year of rooster.. quite a shitty year for me soo hell yeah! i wouldn't misss it.... anyway bye bye rooster!

As we all know this year is the doggie year. To be able to maximize your luck this year; people who will benefit from the year of dog will need to be associated with dogs. As blogged by darren here. It's gonna be a Hot Dog year or what he said the 2006 is a Chinese Red Fire Dog Year. So people get hottttttttttttttttttttttt!

it did come to me that not everyone can keep a dog. Don't worry! this is a solution for you all.... Keep to this and may ya luck gets better this year. may u be prosperous. may you be step step go higher.....

The sinful saikua presents to you. the pattern of the year!

From another angle

Oh......... for the guys who's not got a gf. i wouldn't advice you to visit the sleeeazy hotels/dens to get ya pipes cleaned. that works during the year of chicken; i mean rooster... for the year of the dog, let me introduce to you

The doggie doll

Meet suzy.. or mimi, or lucy... well just call her whatever u want to. i know the hair looks abit like PCK(minus the mole), i do hope they are working on perfecting the look. with this doll you can say bye bye to bad luck for the year! do it the doggie way and may ya year be a good one.

Gong Xi Gong Xi!

Wishing Everyone a Happy Chinese New Year!

Ooooorgasm

2006-01-16T10:45:00.000+08:00

Someday back cassie asked me to check out a picture of her friend in friendster. The moment i see that friend's picture i asked "Was she having an orgasm?"

Her reply was "You are not the first who's asked me this. why do u guys say that?"

urmm how to explain la... it's usually the dreamy eyes and the lips which is partially spread. her face would look like she's pretty tense n all.. not the berak batu kinda tense.... the 'i want more' kinda tenseness ....

Picture below should explain everything...

FYI this is not cassie's friend. It's just some random pix i found off the net. the expression is just priceless :)

Shiang Pimps - DV-383

2006-01-12T22:53:00.000+08:00

Pioneer DVD Player DV-383

Review by Pricegrabber

Pioneer's DV-383 is a DVD player of many talents. It works with NTSC and PAL video formats, and plays discs with any region code. It plays DVDs and CDs just like any other DVD player, but it also plays DivX discs. DivX allows a disc to hold up to 10 times as much information as a regular DVD, and play back with no discernible loss. MP3s, Windows Media and JPEG files will also play in this player. PureCinema Progressive Scan works in NTSC and PAL formats. The Advanced Disc Navigator makes it easy to find your way around your favorite DVDs and provides animated thumbnails of scenes. Video Adjust lets you control the picture settings directly so you don't have to fiddle with the TV. And of course, a remote control is included.

=======

Bought this player at Harvey Norman last weekend. cost $299. wahhh stimmm la. it came highly recommended by a fren who's bought it. he calls it the DBKL machine.. was curious to what he meant till i tested it... all kinda sampah sarap CDs, VCDs or DVDs also can read :)

Bestest is it's able to read those DVDs n VCDs of my tvb serials which i burn... :) BESTEST!

Shiang Pimps - KY of kyspeaks

2006-01-04T11:56:00.000+08:00

Some days back i was chatting with KY on MSN

He asked if i could introduce some online chicks...

Then i told him most of the chicks i know look like this.

He asked got anything not so horrifying or not.. i say got...

He say dun want japs la.. got any taller ones or not. i say got la give me a few minutes let me search first. in the mean time. i told him japs good mah.. they love shit like this

He said tak mau.. don't want. might get killed.. or even if he's not he could b stuck with nipples as large as a kana(some plum shit) seed. whole life stuck with using nipple stickers....

After some high n low searchin... i finally found something.. i mean someone tall and not jap... like he wanted....

Meet Khristianskii Superanskaia. She's not related to superman in anyway. it's just a coincidence. anyway hope KY's happy with the find. :))

p/s final picture of the male blurred to protect the innocent.
pp/s if it didn't work out... at least u live to tell the story. right ky?

Happy Holidays Guys :)

2005-12-29T11:27:00.000+08:00

My wrong for not updating for many many moons.... :)

It's December. One of the busiest period in the year for what i do.

Anyway Christmas was spent at Red Box.....

A week before mass msg'ed everyone for their comfirmation. only 2 guys comfirmed. so i booked for 10....

2 days till chrismas eve.. still nothing. so i invited Cassie, Ting and their Bfs.....

on christmas eve... everyone called say they r coming.. End up with 20 people in the party. well make that 22. with cass n fer arriving at 1am. drunk.... very drunk... n disturbing...

Anyway it might be abit late.. but still... Merry Christmas Guys :)

and a

Happy New Year!

How do you.....

2005-12-07T10:56:00.000+08:00

Shit, Cook and Do your Laundry all at the same time....

Oh.. and the toilet bowl is just perfect to flush away wet disposable leftovers in the kitchen. Only problem i could think of is.. your instant noodle smell the same as what just came off ya anus......

This is our home and if u don't like it.. fuck offf

2005-12-01T15:13:00.000+08:00

Yeah....

Doh Mar : if u don't like how the imperial guards watch over this home; then u fuck off back to your country! my imperial guards morale is way more important than the multi million tourism industry. hidup malaysia! hidup malaysia! hidup malaysia! *takes out keris*

Kitty Xiang : For what you have said, our students in UK have to hide away from other China students because they malu to face Chinese citizens... they use to sit one table play mah jong. now they eat "for woh"(steamboat) together tat time have to split the pot... half malaysia half china... how la like that?

Ah Dolah : Alamak.. They shouldn't overreact la!! they must know we are troooly asia. We welcome foreigners with money of course; whether for cuti cuti malaysia, study, see loctor or buat biziness here. i already 'tegur' Doh Mar de.. he tahu salah laaa. won't repeat his mistake again..... let's me call up Ah Wang;(china's ambassador to Malaysia) and ask if he free go mamak yum cha so can explain.

Kelisa Ko : you try call and see la. i don't think he dare la. after your imperial guard say he use fake passport; detain him and take video of him doing earsquat. he whole life cannot see people ok?

Mus Ah San : *tabikk* We at the imperial force have rights to make u squat whenever we want. after you hide an AK47 or some fengtau pills in the butthole/vagina how? But our priority now must catch itu stupid steven spileberg. film our dungeon and spread it all over town never ask permission or pay royalty at all. since everyone now know about the dungeon, saturday nites we cannot convert the dungeon into dangdut karaoke bar already...... damn i'll surely miss the meimeis on our wednesday nite "shanghai night" theme karaoke..... or the thursday nite "ladies nite"....

Je Fooi : Ooi.. all talk only... no action one?? report say keluar on monday.. see see Doh Mah make matter worse. Kena 'bambu' only by Ah Dollah where got enuff! how can Doh Mah accuse at least a dozen or two of em journalist misunderstood him. He's making a fool of himself n who he represents la... someone kepala now must put on chopping board...... if not how to answer to the rakyat...

Huai Bin Enam : fucker.... my head lor! all the bloggers post the lokap girl up on their blog.... no action taken. and some concern citizen highlighted my post on drugs and police now call me ask me to remove them all. I guess i'll have to post more about those yummy okra and chips from Mexico :) I guess; from all that happened last week.. i'm the only victim........

Rock Son : Not only you la. Visit Malaysia year must postphone also. who want to go malaysia do earsquat or masturbate in the dungeon la? I think Malaysia must learn from Singapore, welcome all the foreigner to Singapore. Singapore is love to suck China lan cheow because our gahmen want the China business. when economy grow then the Imperial Guard get good pay. now all foreginer go home; who to pay them kopi wang. They will have to survive with their peanut gahmen police salary only! Cannot!(Malaysia peanut is not the same as Singapore peanut. Is really peanut.)

What do you think?

2005-11-29T11:17:00.000+08:00

Last sunday, we had a family gathering. a lunch reunion kinda thing to bring the family together after the passing away of one of my aunt.

Anyway this weird thing was bring brought up by one of her daughters...

My aunt has 2 sons and 2 daughters. both her girls are in the States working n holding their green cards there. they have been there for years and have been so ang mo'fied that the chinese rituals they were required to follow after one's passing is done, just for a show of respect. i doubt they believe in any of it.

Anyway, one of this rituals they recently gotta perform is called the wui wan(sprit returning). what they had to do was to cook all their mom's favourites dishes and place it on the tables cuz it is believed that the sprit would return home on the 7th day after the passing away. the offerings would be all the favourite food when she was still here.

that evening they cook all kinda food for their mom. put it onto the table. the monk said that the sprit returning time would be around 9 to 11pm and would leave about 11pm to 1am. so after preparing everything. everyone went upstairs. 3 of em. the 2 daughthers and their sis in law. the 2 brothers weren't around cuz of work commitment. so in the house there were only 3 of em girls.

then at 8 plus.. just before nine.. it started raining....

they ran outside thinking the candles placed outside the house would go off. to their surprise the candles did not... these candles is placed at the entrance to lead the sprit home. after being asked they say it's just the normal prayer candles. not those high end water prove shit. but still.. the candle did not go off even in the rain n the wind.... weird? so they went back into the house

as it approaches 9, all 3 of em rush upstairs.. into 1 room :P yeah... they were all afraid... whole nite they did not dare to go downstairs. the 2 brothers cannot go home if they can't be home by 9pm so they had to sleep out that nite.

the next morning... when they got downstairs they saw something which none of em could explain. the plates were touched. there were fingerprints. of ashes. from the joss stick. all of the plates and the 3 bowls of rice were touched except for this toufu dish which they later said their mom did not really fancy.

both the girls really didn't know what to say cuz being as sceptical as the were the day before, nothing could explain where this fingerprints came from. the rituals does not allow em to keep any of the food or plates so it all has to go into the trash.

i know, even it's my aunt, or my cousins' mom; stilll abit spooky kan??

Cat : I know my mom laa!! but still come that nite damn scared ok!
Uncle S (an uncle): eh the candle really so terror?
Cat : how i know woh. it's just normal candle we buy from those shops la.
Uncle S : u give me two tonite i lite up outside my house n see if ya mom come back or not
Cat : hahhh?
Auntie K(his wife) : you don't ki siao! (be crazy)
Uncle S : hah why?
Auntie K : our house got nothing to eat... after you invite those u don't know in how???
Uncle S : oh guess not.....

Discrimination or prejudice?

2005-11-24T12:15:00.000+08:00

As you can see these aren't some hot chicks that you would wanna be playing tai wa sik.. or 5 seconds your bottle of Chivas with at some sleazy karaokes. this are middle aged ladies that are married to malaysians. they are here as someone elses wife. some kiddo's mother. not some sleazy 18 year old siao mei that you can bed for $188.

but then, i could be wrong. they could be here for other motives but then even if they are gonna enter the country illegaly they would probably be ones selling pirates song cds.. or some made in china ky.(not this KY). if those are their trade, surely they r being brought in by local syndicates just like many other chinadolls that's working in the flash trade. why don't they go after these syndicates?

i was told this flash trading girls from CN pay about RMB30,000 (RM15,000) to come to malaysia for work. That includes their agent fees, air tickets and accomodation here. They come in as tourist. So they have that 3 months to earn back as much before they go back. for every job they do (usually around $170-$200) . 1/2 of it belong to em and half of it is taken by the pimps(not this KY). so by 3 months if they can't earn back those money spent to come here. very likely they will choose to overstay to earn back what they have put in.

how do we justify the authenticacy of their visits to Malaysia. pretty ones cannot come in? then it would be discrimation against the pretty ones. and all the ahpeks in some sleeazy suburban karaokes will be getting this kinda chics at their local shoplot karaokes......

The Warm Bra

2005-11-22T12:39:00.000+08:00

TOKYO - Furry, heated bras may soon appear in some Japanese wardrobes as the country prepares for "Warm Biz" — a nationwide government campaign urging workers to bundle up and save energy on heating this winter.

The bra also has removable pads that can be heated in a microwave or hot water — as well as long, furry straps that wrap around the neck like a scarf, and matching shorts.

"Warm Biz lets you add a little fun and chic to office wear, and prevents global warming," Triumph says.

Read : Warm, Fuzzy Winter Bra Unveiled in Japan

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I guess everyone who's living in a 4 seasons climate countries will have to consider swithing to this bras. global warming is not some tiny issue. we wouldn't want the great polar bears to die just because some of the girls refuse to use the furry looking bra! oh.. to think about it... thank you triumph! with this innovation. we will still have our furry polar bears.. and in addition, furry hot chics in short pants.. *yummy*

anyway.. if this thing does go into the market with a bang. sales of mircowave will likely increase too. soon we'll find mircowaves in the ladies; and occasionally hear the cleaner kakak go..

"eh beg tetek siapa dalam tandas ni?"

Infrared images without and With the Warm Bra

W00t

2005-11-17T15:35:00.000+08:00

Wah so fucking on la!

Damn. My first encounter of two gurls kissing was in a club and i was like 20? this gurls are already doing it in school...... i'm not sending my kids to school next time.....

People die de go where?

2005-11-17T00:44:00.000+08:00

People die de go where?

Last thursday, one of my aunt past away at the age of 52. she's had problems with her health; mostly cause by her eating habits. she loves to eat. crabs, prawns, scallops, ducks, etc.. cuz of all this eating, she's admited to the hospital a couple of times for diabetes, high blood pressure and some other sickness i am not really sure how to explain.

anyway the day she past away, she was having her favourite curry laksa, upon finishing she went over to the cendol store for her favourite dessert. as she was walkin back to meet up with my cousin, she fainted and that was it. she ate her way to her death i guess. to think about it, we are quite glad for at least when she left us, she was doing the things she really enjoyed.

when people sometimes tell me off for the things i enjoy eating, my only reply was

"ehh now don't eat old de; here sick there sick; how to eat"

use to think like that but then now i think it's not that wise afterall. so i told my cousin i wanna go on diet n stop eating those bad bad stuff. and he instantly went,

"let me introduce to u this xxxbrandshit. a kinda powder drink u just mix. u just drink a cup a day"

i replied "fucking no way! i'm not drinking that disgusting green shit. i'm not a cow"

i guess diet was the wrong word to use... i shouldn't say i would stop eating those high cholesterol stuff. like the crab eggs(hai kou) yummyy.... i should just cut down on it i guess.

anyway at her funeral last week, i was helping out her son(my cousin) with the funeral and all. at times i was helping him babysit Amanda, his 8 year old daughter(my neice)

Amanda : kau fu, mahmah(grandma) die de
Me : yes dear. mahmah has left us
Amanda : Left us go where woh? she don't want to stay with me and daddy already?
Me : *scratch head*think faster think faster*
Me : Well mahmah left us and go to heaven already.
Amanda : Hah? Heaven got what woh?
Me : there mahmah leg no more pain pain. she will be very happy there. she get to do everything she want there.
Amanda : i can go find mahmah?
Me : *sei la*how to answer*
Me : Well if you good girl next time you can (???? hahaha) Amanda don't ask so many question la u faster go burn those paper money for mahmah
Amanda : money? can use one?
Me : yah ah.. u burn money for mah mah she in heaven got money to use lor. then she can buy lots of things for herself.
Amanda : really ah?

Throughout the 3 days of the funeral Amanda just couldn't stop burning those paper money. everytime anyone asked her where her mah mah has gone, she will just tell everyone the story i told her.

i alwiz thought it would be difficult to explain death to kids, but what i came out with works quite ok right? i know i shouldn't lie to kids but then i guess this should do till they grow older and understand death more..

The Beijing Olympic$

2005-11-16T00:24:00.000+08:00

2008 Beijing Olympic Mascots

(Beibei Jingjing Huanhuan Yingying Nini)

For the first time ever, for the 2008 Beijing Olympic we get 5 mascots. in a kwai lou mind. sure it's a good thing. why 1 when u can have 5. in a chinamen mind.......... why sell one when can sell 5!

Seee! and some of u think the chinamen organizers are just being nice and all with 5 really cute mascots. just think about it, now for every mug, key chain, umbrella, etc they sell.. they'll just follow up with "Ni yau mai yi tao ma?" (do you wanna buy a set?).

For Sydney and Athens Olympic, sales of gift n merchandise got to about $300 million each. Imagine what the chinaman will b raking with 5 mascots!

alwiz being associated as matakecik and small kkj.. this is one of the few reason why am i so damn proud to be a chinese ! how cunningly smart!

oh by the way i think the mascots are really ugly... like some power ranger/sailor moon shit they copy off the TV. just like how china pirate everything else off anything.

saisaikuakua @ shiangshiang

p/s anyone know if Beijing is near the hokkien province or something? i suspect this 5 mascots idea a work of some hokkiens if not... some singaporeans at least....

Hope.....

2005-11-13T02:29:00.000+08:00

This are things tat sometimes i wish would come through....

tingting® says:
I had a dream of u last night
tingting® says:
U were getting married
tingting® says:
& I came to ur wedding in a porshe
tingting® says:
Ur wife in dream is pretty

Ting, I wish you get your porshe. as for a pretty wife; my only wish is for a nice, kind hearted person. don't need to be pretty. ting do u know if that wifey of mine in ya dream a hokkien? hahaha no offense. between me and hokkien chicks it just wouldn't work.

China - The Food

2005-11-10T10:46:00.000+08:00

Every trip to china i've had many many exotic (erotic too) can-only-be-found-in-china food. this time there's no exception. and this time :) i had a camera :)

This dinnner we had was on the second day of the trip.

The main attraction for tonite is called Wo Fa Chiok (sawah padi bird). This are seasonal birds that fly over a few areas in china. it feed on grains(rice) that's still not being harvested. this little birdies are quite selective at what they eat. they only tiok(eat) the best grains of the plants and therefore considered a pest because they have taken off the good things from this chinamen.

it's seasonal because this is the time of the year where their bones become really soft and you can eat the whole bird without leaving any bones. Also due to their specific food requirement, i was told this birds are very clean and healthy to eat. it cost RMB38(RM19) per bird. so it doesn't come cheap. the serving you see below is off two dozen so you do the calculation.

This is what we had

For a closer Look at our main dish...

After it's all being cooked this is how it look

Yummyyy.... little birdiesssss....................

Steps to eating little cute birdies.

1) Obviously put one onto ya plate

p/s by the way top left of the photo... well those r maggots... maggots steam egg... yummy.

2) Then you bite the beak off

3) Then take big bite onto the head n neck.. it taste like some prawn head. chewy n juicy. :P~~ and for those who doesn't take prawn head. welll it taste like some chew cheow fish ball.. u bite the fish ball n u feel the *squissshh* in the mouth. same here. oh i forgot to mention the throat area of the bird there r still rice grain in it. they did not remove it when cleaning because i was told that's the nicest part of the bird. so when u bite the head n neck off you will taste rice :)

4. when u r done with the head. take another bite and you'll get to the liver area.

5. another bite and you will reach the butt area. around there there's tis tiny pocket like thingy where u cannot eat. it contains sand and all. so u need to take it out before u slurp everything up

6. what's left over... the legs.... everyone else ate it.. i just couldn't take it anymore. not like it's some chicken feet. this feet look too tiny

Anyway Since i'm at it, let me introduce another dish we had on the same night....

Maggots Steam Eggs Garnished with Spring Onions

The Concert

2005-11-02T01:10:00.000+08:00

Me : *dial and call justin*
J : yo..mat si?
Me : no la.. u wanna play sam kar?(not threesome.... 3legged mahjong)
J : no la canot... at a concert now
Me : huh mat lan? what concert?
J : yea check it out man *ting*ting*tong*ting*tong*tong*ting*ting*tong*
Me : mat tong tong ah(What the fuck)? cannot hear la
J : hear properly la *tok*tok*tok*tok*....
Me : don't know laaaa.... canot hear. where are you?
J : fucker i'm in a funeral laa......
Me : cibai! *end call*

Later, a SMS to Justin

"eh next time your solo concert can we do away with the monks and replace em with some feng tau djs?"

=================

On another note, tomorrow morning i'm flying to HK and then going to china for holidays again. gonna spread love to motherland :)

Dragon(here , here n here) and Kel(here and here) will be joining me this time.. one kaki perempuan one kaki minum :) can't wait to start drinking with em!

Will be back on monday and hopefully i'll be able to get some nice pics to put up :)

Enjoy ya holiday guys!

Road Hazzard?

2005-10-25T00:05:00.000+08:00

It has been really busy period at work for the last couple of weeks. lots of driving around to clients place n to supplier's place.. aiyah suddenly feel like despatch de. and someore lately everywhere also jam.. dunno why la.

last friday afternoon i was driving past subang. as my car approach a traffic light at this T-junction which will lead me to the federal highway; something amusing kinda happened. it's one of those lights where u wait for ages before it changes to green. as i approach the junction it turns yellow and then red... so near hari raya... mata-mata everywhere. trying not to break any rules. fuck la. have to wait. so there i am stuck at the light for at least the next 5 minutes. ok i have got 5 mins.. should i call someone and chat, should i dig my nose or should i just day dream away....

i was going for the nose digging thing when i notice a car slowing down n stopping beside me.. look see; look see... WAH CUN CHICK!.... not bad some more. drive one of those old datsun. but then focus was on her....

stealing glances.. peek abit now and then

After a while i think she notice..... and since she already notice i figured no need to curi curi de so i mah.....

Then i think she shy de.... so i mah (but still catching glimpses of her la)

She gave the fuck off bastard look to me n turn around n started looking at the mirror n doing her hair.. or pimples.. aiyah i dunno laa

then i suddenly...

Her car started rolling backwards. i think she didn't notice the car was rolling cuz she was still looking at the mirror. it's rolling closer to the car behind.... closer.. and closeerr andd....

then it happened...*BANG* she bump into the car behind her. she got shock and exit the car..
she saw me looking and i went

she jeling me this you idiot look at me... and i turn away.. when she weren't looking i just could not help it but to......

bahh.. this r the kinda shit that should happen more often at the lights... AS LONG as you not behind someone like her.... anyway as i look at the lights again.. it turned green....

That was fast :)

Just Remember!... A lady in a car is dangerous. A gal with a mirror in a car... well that's lethal. don't stay too close ya?

i know i damn bad! but heyyyyyyyy who told you i was nice?

and alwiz remember;

Nice guys don't get laid!

ELECTION (18SG) Do not bother watching

2005-10-24T11:57:00.000+08:00

This was suppose to be entertaining. I'm a huge fan of these triad movies. yeahh laa gansta wannabes and all.. but then :) bad boys alwiz get the girls remember??

Anyway it's a movie about the elders electing the next dragon head. Simon yam was good and tony was excellent potraying his character as some crazy dog triad boss. they were fighting each other to be the dragon head... how to identify yaself as a dragon head? a stick. urmm.. yeah baton like.. carved on it is a dragon. and yes. you are right. the whole movie they were fighting to obtain this one stick. it is not that bad la considering both Simon and Tony yau yeng'ness.... but then aren't the girls the one that's suppose to b fighting for something like this? urmm..

Close to the end Simon won the election, n when tony finally accepted the results, both got back on good terms and worked together n became good partners. there's even a scene where tony double cross a rival triad boss into believing he would betray simon yam. which of course he didn't. he double double cross the bad guy n got him killed instead. yi hei right? read further...

All this lead us to the final scene where simon yam n tony leung with their family went fishing and then simon yam out of the smallest issue took up a huge stone and started wacking tony. (in a friendly manner tony suggested 2 dragon head to run the triad just like directors in companies)

the ever so cool simon yam which throughout the whole movie was at all time cool n careful with what he does; took up a huge stone n started smacking it onto Tony and killed him. then police move in. handcuff him and all n led him to jail...........to add in the last part... Louis Koo(simon's follower) was in the police station and went "Yes Sir" n the police head congrats him for being a successful in his undercover mission

Today, i got online to check n found out our cinemas here are showing the China version. where all bad things will eventually turn good. fuck em la.. in HK they get the bloody ending(original) version. i just figure forget about fucking showing this movie if u are gonna totally change the whole storyline n leave us without an ending.

Just so the director want to break into the market of other countries they change and add in the extraminutes and turn their viewers into monkeys thinking the movie was suppose to be that

i really don't like the idea of em turning a movie into something like this. it's like makin a fool out of the viewers.DO not waste ya time if you are getting the China version(undercover version) totally waste of your time n makin you feel like a fool/cheated.

My advice? Wait for the VCD/DVD. get em to test it out and make sure it's not the undercover version.

p/s anyway we felt cheated watchin the movie.. so we went out through the entrance.. walk into another cinema and watched another movie.. Transporter 2.... but fuck.. like watchin superman only

Yummmyy...

2005-10-04T12:05:00.000+08:00

8 to 80 years old.... all the same laaa ....

The Cheesssy Dinner

2005-09-30T13:18:00.000+08:00

Last nite, Ting n MH, Cassie n Fer, J, Ming and i met up for dinner

It's at this place called "The Fondue House" located just opposite the club/pub called Soda (aka Bar Med aka Dragon Bar?). It's been around a few months already.

Ok what they serve?

Cheeeseee and lots of cheeseeee

How they serve? tar pin lou the western style......

Most serving comes for 2 pax. You order what kinda meat you want. Chic, beef or seafood. then you select what kinda cheese you want. Comes in for type of cheese; vege, garlic, bacon or crabmeat cheese. the cheese will be served on a small hot pot. you are given a fork and u poke your meat n dip it into which ever pot of cheeese you like...

only difference from tar pin lou is... the meat r all cooked. you just dip it into the pot of cheese and eat it. as for tar pin lou the stuff are usually raw (except for those fooo chuks *:P~~~* those crispy nice... ok ok but wait today we talk about the fondue)

Oh and u must be saying tar pin lou chinese style u get to drink the soup? well, i'm not sure if it's customary.. but we did ask for spoons and slurrpppp almost all the cheese off the pots... Cass had the most. ting second....

this is a must try for a cheessse lover

after we r done tar pin lou'ing with cheese.... we ordered desert. fruit platter with chocalate and whiskey fondue........ yes!!! tar pin lou'ing your fruits. you dip you fruits into a hot pot filled with yummmyyyy chocolate fudge... wahh HEAVANNNN La!

last nite i found out

1) Cheese stirred together with beer don't mix well and the taste is.. urmm... like beer...
2) Apple dip with cheese is yummy... especially when it's garlic cheese.
3) Calimari rings coated with chocolate fudge is fucking stim :) damn nice
4) Cheese can make u moan
5) There are grapes that look like arm choon pei tan (preserved pegion eggs)

Anyway for photos of what we had, Ting has got some posted on her site... go go go

Fondue House
No 5, Plaza Prisma Ville,
Jalan 26A/70A,
Desa Sri Hartamas,
50480 Kuala Lumpur

p/s by the way, if u visit the shop try mention the name Celeste and maybe it can get u 10% discount. she goes there weekly for her cheesy dose

pp/s for those already know what fondue is. yes la! i damn ulu ok

Do i look so desperate?

2005-09-28T11:32:00.000+08:00

I know i do sound desperate sometimes.... but really.. i'm not.

Last wedding i was at, the big cum sister asked me...

BCS : ehh you look well, got good job? got car.. you married de?
Me : urmm not yet laa... GF also don't have
BCS : *lightens up* wah!! ehh i know got few very nice gals you want me to intro?
Me : wah ! gum ke yeh ! lei mo kau ngor.....
BCS : why nottt laa they are very nice gals... you would like them ga.
Me : moi la!!! damn lou tou la! i'm not doing such thing....

Sigh.. my main purpose of being a heng tai n drivin around like a bunch of lost sheeps is because we usually get to know the chi muis and all. meeting girls the conventional way. not this kinda arranged stuff. damn lou tou man.

siong tai is like chiew gang(pose for mirror) like that... you know like those chu jais sitting behind a 2 way mirror... and you pick one u like.. only difference is, there's only one to choose and there's no $$$ transaction taking place ;) and obviously.. she will have to choose you too. if both smooth eye each other than can go hang kai, tai sei, sik fan n if you are lucky; hoi fong.... ( test drive mah...)

if both ngam then good la.... but how often does this work? if the other party is some chu par how? excuse yaself n just walk off? rude rude rude... anyway this is so so so lou tou... never attempt it.. unless you are nearing expiry :P then need to si si tan tan get attach to something.. i mean someone... but hey; at that time de.. beggars can't b chosers right? :P

OH yah! if ask to be driver/hengtai again next time; i must b more seng mok de... be heng tai that time... faster faster offer those chi muis to sit in my car.. before those yi ma ku jies and big cum sister rush into the car... really cannot tahan their ngi ngi ngum ngum.

Malaysia Idol Tonite!

2005-09-23T11:52:00.000+08:00

I got this off the Malaysia Idol Forum

Photo taken off user basdavdan

Anyway a user in the forum posted something worth a thought. why u shouldn't vote for Daniel. Daniel seems like the heavy favourite to win tonite. Judging from the poll at the official site at least.

User E N D O F D A Y S posted;

Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 1:20 pm Post subject: IF YOU REALLY LOVE DANIEL, DON'T VOTE FOR HIM THIS TIME !

what's actually better for him. if he wins:
1. he'll be Malaysian Idol 2005 - hooray! but he MUST release a malay album.
2. he'll be bounded by contract - unable to sign any new contract deals for 2 to 3 yrs i think (u think malays are going to buy his Malay Album?)
3. after his contract duration - 2 to 3 years - he'll be forgotten like a waltz. there will be MI 2006, MI 2007, etc. who will remember him? remember, an artist should seize hold of oppourtunity when he's at the PEAK / HOTTEST period. which is NOW for him.

if he loses (becomes the 1st runner up):
1. he'll be FAMOUS - he already is - as the MI 2005 1st runner up.
2. he can sign a Chinese recording contract - and have a chance of being a international superstar alongside Zhang Dong Liang, Z Chen and all the local hotties in Taiwan.
3. if he really wants to record a malay / english album, he can do so. the choice is his. so if you love him, you know what to do right?

--------------

He does make some sense u know. I was already plannin on doing 5 votes at least for daniel. he can't sing malay neither can he do well in english songs. but we all know he can sing... in chinese everyone presume; but then it's still not proven yet. Being able to make it all the way to the finals i think is purely more of an indication he's the most popular artitst in Idol 05. nita got to the final we can all agree is due to her singing.

anyway... dilemma now.. to vote or not to vote......

Siong Hei Weekend

2005-09-20T10:20:00.000+08:00

Siong Hei (Double Happiness)

Last sunday is a double happiness weekend for many. firstly it's the mooncake festival and secondly alot of them surrendered their license to screw around on that day. -urm now they have to do it illegally..... ;)

Anyway last weekend was Ah Seng, my high school friend's wedding day. on the eve of the wedding i was invited to his house for this makan makan session. these nites usually end up with lotsa gambling n drinking yaself stupid but then.. this one is different. lots of yi ma ku jies there. not many friends. seeing that. nearly chau kan(cramp) de. i very seng muk(quick minded). faster faster say wanna go home got something to do. I asked if he needed help the following day and if he has enough cars to go with him. Ah Seng asked if i was free to help. i say shouldn't be a problem.

Reach his house early the following morning. nothing much.. they did the normal prayers stuff. the big cum sister(tai kam jie) will chant her scripted dialouges and all.. wah cannot tahan damn chang kai(long winded)... at about 8.30am we left his place to Subang to the wife's place.

If you have read the previous Heng tai (this and this) experience of mine you would know that it's not gonna b easy to get the door open to get into the bride's house. Same thing happened.

This time upon reaching, the chi muis gave us 5 cups. one for the groom n the rest for 4 other hengtais. must finish it. it's neat lemon juice with pepper. i was hiding behind; so those damn yau yi hei (stupid, urm.. frens that will die for u :P) heng tais teng chi siong(fight all the way up). confusious say only "Man who stand in battle front die like frog".. ok ok.. i said it

Second task, 5 people each one must give the exact change of 99 cents n they'll open the door. what the heck we r not some tip box at KFC... not being able to do that; we got punish again. this time they took out some buns. char siew bun wah not bad! ehh but wait

"green color geh!!!"

cibai.. bun stuffed with wasabi...i had to do a piece too since there were like a whole plate of it. tears started flowing. it's like a scene off the titanic.. when the ship sank.... but for me, the tears were for Ah Seng. his sacrifice n surrenderin of his freedom. my heart is with him.

after that the chi muis opened the door. we heng tais sat outside while his finance controller(the guy with ang pow in every single pocket of his) went in with him... i heard Seng had to do a couple of other task before being allow up the stairs. we were sitting outside.. 3 of those guys that had the lemon juice look dammnn sick. one guy ran off outside the house n i heard puking. one went to toilet.. n the other one joined the first guy by the drain a short while later. gotta find out later they have gastric problems. so that cup of lemon juice was worse than a whole glass of liquor; to a gastric patient at least.

Ah Seng sent someone to call all the hengtais in again. they dun wanna let him open the bride's room door. say must do other things. we got in n was given another 5 cups.. i was given one this time. smelt it. sweet stuff! shouldn't be bad.. then someone tasted it n went

"sei la!!! condensed milk tim yum(how to drink) ah?"

hahahah fuck.... first sour, then spicy then now sweet. wah tai wok.. no one was willing to drink... then suddenly one of the chi muis said something..

"mmm yum tak(dun drink can)! use money to kai kuit(settle) also can!"

phewwww any problem that can be kai kuit with money is never a problem... Ah Seng paid up.. hahaha i think it was $100 a cup.. so there were 5 cups so there goes $500.....

thinking we could go in; suddenly from behind the door the wife say ask him to sing... hahahaha kesian sial! ask to sing "Lau Su Ai Ta Mi"... that time I also abit irritated de... drink already, eat already, pay already.. now have to sing?

"Ah Seng... Mo chui hei la(dun marry her)!!!! i bring u go karaoke we find chong kok(China) meimei... and sing Pang Yau(friends)!!!"

He shake his head n went "moiii laaa" n then got everyone to sing the stupid rat love rice song a few times....

Finally after singing; they open the door.. we heng tais got back outside. all worn out. one of the guy ran outside again. n puke for the second time. kesian him....

----------------------------

After all the prayers, chum cha(tea pouring) and photo sessions, we left back to Ah seng's house. the wedding car drove off damn quickly.... i got left behind. then mah chai yau(accelerate) la.... got into federal highway.... then manage to catch up again... after driving for a few minutes... i took notice the cars infront, the ribbons on their anthena why different color already one? peep peeep n see.. wedding car(BMW) still in front mah.. then i decide to overtake n see properly...

"cibai! follow wrong car" those cars following the stranger's newly wed people all stare cock at me... wah la damn paisehh... accelerate and drove back to Ah Seng's house myself....... i got to his house before he did so not so yi(embarassin) la....

Chao hai... getting marry damn fucking ma fan right? And someore marry de....

"man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink" Confucious

I need my ciggiees.s..s...

2005-09-17T09:44:00.000+08:00

What the fuck!

All shop stop selling ciggies cuz there'll be a price increase. n fuck it's only gonna happen next week? cibai.. so this few days no ciggies to smoke? petrol station. coffee shop, mamak semua tak mau jual....

hai lat lorr....

walked around n around to find ciggie. went to 3 petrol station. only shit they r selling are those that they can't sell. or probably those expired ciggies. cibai, sei la.. mo yin tim shuin ah...

i even told a trader at a coffeeshop. cibai next week raise $1 is it?? i buy u at that price laa.. fucker also dun wanna sell...... so i walk n walk n went to this little makeshift mamak stalll.... n i saw *chinggggggg*

MARLBORO LIGHTS

"AHHHHH NEH!!!! itu marbolo kecik ada berapa?? "

Maple : " tiga!"

"SEEEEEEEEEEMUAAA mau!!"

wah la.. lit the first ciggieee of the day...

Heaaaavennn laaaaa

GO TO JAIL for Racism?

2005-09-14T14:43:00.000+08:00

In advance and shiny land of Singapore, we "not so smart malaysians"; if visiting should really watch what u say.

Two bloggers charged under Sedition Act over racist remarks

Wonder what did these two doods said that got them there. if they said really offensive stuff. Well serve them right. But then if it was something minor like

Woi Keling! or

Babi punya Cina !

Then buta buta go to jail right? How racist is racist?

I was expecting to see the name of a stuck-up blogger but then was disappointed when it was not the person. i'm not sure if what they both said was as bad as this

The Remarks...

"This Malay fucker just stared at me (in a rude manner) when I asked him politely! "
"If I got a pig with me I surely hit him with the pig."
"They are either young bengs, or bangalas. I don't know if they are really bangalas but they look like they are."

I would b offended if i was a malay. but then if it's coming from some bimboish looking yapunmui wannabe; i guess it's ignorable. Enough bout her de abit sian jor... one whole week people talk about her; like if she will have effect on how we malaysians should be like :)

Back to the topic; from the link above...

"First time offenders can be fined up to S$5,000, or jailed up to three years, or both. "

"For subsequent offences, they can be jailed up to five years and have their seditious publications forfeited and destroyed. "

Wonder if they got internet access in Singapore jails or not. No la do not plan on moving in. just curious cuz they alwiz say the country so clean and so advance.... who knows if they do; one day u might get to read blogs with titles like "Digging ya way out of Jail" or "Jails for Dummies"

Bah! Guess not. i don't think i make sense today. Sorry for having u go through this.

Love really that blind?

2005-09-14T10:40:00.000+08:00

Love really that blind?

People do get blinded when they're in love. most people do but then, i really can't understand how this couple will survive in a city... not Kapar not Raub, but a city like Penang. They are recently married with the wife earning about $1700 and the husband making $400 a month while seeking fulltime employment. if he's working in a CC cuz he damn addicted to DOTA. then i really think they r in for some trouble.

Don't get me wrong.. i'm not diss'ing them. they are like what they say in canto, kin yat pou hung yat pou(see one step take one step) kinda people i guess. i mean, to start a family, how can you be just equiep with such nothingness. i do understand that not all are born with a silver spoon but then those that don't; would usually consider before getting themselves commited to such huge thing like a marriage. i don't think what they are earning fullfill the neccesities even if it does; it's gonna b barely. not in a city. not when u drive a car and holds a handphone.

really pooi fuk this people dunno how they can survive. if u tell me they stay in some rural place like those between karak to kuantan maybe can understand la but in a city?? luckily penang don't have as many toll booth as KL.

as for me. i think getting married WITHOUT the fundamentals such as a house and a car would b very wrong. not being materialistic. just practical i think. why should a couple start scratching their heads over house loans, car installments and stuff like insurance after getting married. the babies will be on the way soon. sang jais mmm pien yi ga! 5k at least. natural birth ok la but operations not cheap now a days. then, somemore the wife have to pou pou n pou with alottt of goood stufff......not cheap ok? wah headache sial...

i now got no car got no house. wait got car but still belong to bank... i paid for the tyres only. and maybe the car ciggie lighter. sigh.. tim kau luis... tim chui lou por ahhhhhhh

sigh...........

and btw :) i do wish the couple that was featured in the star well. Hope they make it...

Code : Black Party @ Zouk

2005-09-09T12:50:00.000+08:00

Commmmmmmmme comeeeeeeeeeeeee..

See You There :)

Karaoke sessions with saikua..

2005-09-07T15:32:00.000+08:00

The girls are usually....

And the guys would usually

Crazy Tuesday

2005-09-07T14:37:00.000+08:00

Crazy Tuesday

Last nite was kinda happening....

First WK called... asked me if i've got any plans. he wanna tong por. Said ok.. meet up about 8 plus. Hang up de Ben called. then couple of minutes later Cassie called asked to go play dart n drink stout at Finns but told her i agreed to go Ceasars's for snooker de. Sorry la cass.

after i hung up, Dragon called to ask go drinking. i said i'll b going to SS 2 for snooker. he say he wanna join but will b downstairs drinking(at this pub beside the char Chan teng).

Pick stanley up n left to Ceasar's. WK was already there. played our 3rd frame of snooker and then Dragon showed up. asked us to faster join em down stairs. same old reason la

"come ah; alot of girls!!"

Bah... i kena more than enuff times to really trust people who says that now. anyway he left back downstairs while we continue playing our snooker. then he called... ask how many of us. i say 3. he say ok come down in 10 minutes. eat sharksfin.

i went fuck what this crazy fucker doing. inside a pub? sharksfin?

about 15 minutes later after playin 4 games with WK. we went downstairs. true enough to his words there were 3 bowls of sharksfin soup on the table waiting for us. gila fucker order from tai thong upstairs. but hey :P freeee one la.. sure eat laaaaaaa.

btw, he didn't lie about the girls either. two chicks there. Karen and Mandy. Mandy looks normal. Karen is cute. She's got this babyfat with her. si si man man and pak pak jang jang someore. wahhh... beh ta han. dunno why my sharksfin soup seems like getting more n more instead of finishin.... :P~~~~ anyway both the girls are the peh chau(beer) muis there :) waitressing job but then they do drink with the customers also.

after drinking the second tower(by the way they serve the beer in towers. 1 tower is about 9 mugs), karen say she hungry. Dragon took his phone up n called tai tong again. a captain came down. it was fucking 10 pm and they wanted to order some shit still. dragon wanted to order suckling pig. captain said the chef left de. the girls wanted to eat fish. didn't really hear what they ordered.

anyway about 30 minutes later the captain with another boy(waiter) came down with the dishes. cibai they ordered.. soy sauce steam cod fish and deep fried prawns.

i went FUCK! why order this shit? who not yet eat? we r in a pub laa. fucker not in some chinese restaurant. Captain why not bring 2 bowls of rice! (if u don't know; white rice + fish soy sauce = orgasmatic)

then they say karen order geh. i suddup.... pick up the plate n chopstick....

"karen lei you kei tai fai ah? here here.. larm tit chup siong hei." *cut fish put on platefor her* what to do... i'm really weak to babyfats...........

5 of us drank 3 towers. anyway i dunno what occasion was it yesterday but dragon said

"Tonite must use up $2000!!! drinkkkk uppp don't save for me"

bah.. i think we only manage blowin up $1000 . so tonite he say go night club...

wanna come?

anyway, yesterday nite upon reachin home. i just couldn't help it.. the sharksfin and the cod fish ended up where they belong. in my toilet bowl... really canot tahan had to puke........

Now i know :

Sharksfin + Steam fish do not go with Beer. Lots of Beer....... but FUCKERRR who the heck order steam fish in a pub right????

Stupid Quiz

2005-09-07T12:12:00.000+08:00

Stupid Quiz

I don't usually do this.. but then what the heck...
Celeste only cuz you asked...

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Shiang 2. h2s 3. Fei jai

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. h2s 2. shiang 3. saikua

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. short legs 2. short hands 3. large penis

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DONT LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. short 2. round 3. bouncy

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. chinese, ......?

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. No money 2. No women 3. No alcohol

THREE OF YOUR EVERY DAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Ciggies 2. Internet 3. Handphone

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING NOW:
1. Red 2. Pink 3. Purple

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS, OR MUSICAL ARTISTES:
I don't listen to much music

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS:
I don't listen to songs

THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Sex 2.Trust 3.Freedom

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I am fat 2. money rule the world
3. I masturbate on seeing Paris Hilton's porn.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Baby fat 2. Face 3. Fair

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
1. TVB series 2. Ma kei(horse machine) 3. Eating Si hums

THREE THINGS YOU REALLY WANT TO DO REALLY NOW:
1. have sex 2. wash up 3. sleeep

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. Medium 2. Full time Mahjong player 3. Durex Co. Official Product Tester

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Amst, Netherlands - for their cookies 2. russia for their vodka 3. Brazil for their ladies

THREE NAMES YOU LIKE FOR KIDS:
1. Alpha 2. Beta 3. Charlie

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Get loans from the banks 2. Get money from Ah Loongs 3. Buy Cassie crates of GStout.

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. scratch my balls. 2. getting turn on by round things. 3. don't talk about other guys.

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. cry when titanic sank. 2. AWWWWWW when u see something cute 3. sing twins' songs

THREE FEMALE CELEBRITY CRUSHES:
1. gotten over this 15 years ago...

THREE PEOPLE WHOM I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ:
1. Not gonna put anyone else through this......

Would you...

2005-09-05T15:34:00.000+08:00

Attend your ex gf/bf's wedding??

For me i would(well actually i did before) but then i guess not everyone could be as hoi fong as i am. i've seen friends going to their ex'es weddings and getting teased till their face have to hide beside the big fat auntie's butt whois sitting beside em at the wedding. but on a serious note the worst case was when i went to this friend's wedding who has a bunch of rich snobbish friends.

a friend, ET; he was just quietly sitting down not bothered with all the yum seng going around when suddenly a bastard out of no where annoucned out loudly'

"fuck you guys. why everyone tooi me?? not my wedding also la fuckers. today this wedding only got 2 people here with the right to get drunk. the grooom... and him!!!! (pointing at my friend)"

suddenly everyone suddup. all stare at ET. that time i really pity him. seriously if it was me i would just walk over to that bastard n give him a black eye or something. but then; it's a wedding ceremony and all it wouldn't be approriate.

Luckily though, his GF was with him. All he did was forced a smile off himself n pretend nothin happened. but i could see that he really wanna smack the ashtray on that guy's face.

Back to the topic. Would you attend ya ex's wedding?

Stan is facing such dilemma now. His ex, A is gettin married to P. All of us are high school friends. when we asked Stan, he got jumpy n fucking swear that if anyone bring out the old matters or tease him about any of the shit that's happened before; he's gonna just walk off the wedding. wa! si beh serious. no one dare said anything since then. Wedding is coming up end of this month. hahahah hope no one gonna b stupid n say silly things.

The last such wedding i went to was about 2 years ago. Good thing was all the people there were quite civilize and i was seated with a bunch of her nicer friends. wanna know what went through my mind during that wedding?

would he(groom) be curious how i had her?
when they were playing the 'younger days' photo on the projector for everyone to see i went . fuck the photo crop to half!?? the other half was me when we went to phillip island together! no other pics meh?
shit her boobs looks bigger de....
and lastly; is the baby mine??

i really hope my other ex reads this so they wouldn't bother inviting me to any of their weddings. no need to paiseh for not inviting :) i paiseh if invited and i don't show up.

Why ain't we offering aids to the US

2005-09-03T12:47:00.000+08:00

Reading on the Hurricane Katrina disaster today i felt really bad for people living in the affected areas. Imagine being told that some huge ass hurriane is coming and you gotta leave ya home n ya belongings. it's not easy leaving everything behind.

I'm sure now many have heard about what happened. If you don't then go to CNN or God's blog for a rough idea what this hurricane is about.

And you know what. people up there in the garmen or the foreign affairs should at least read blogs or something if they don't have the habit of reading CNN to keep themselves updated with foreign issues. why am i saying this?

U.S. thanks dozens of foreign countries for aid

Sad thing is?

Where's the name of our country in the list of countries that's offered help???

If they have done so and was late for publication then it's ok. but then knowing how things r run and our dun give a fuck attitude; i highly doubt anything was done to show that we even care.

When tsunami struck us. look at the amount of help we were offered; furthemore take into consideration we are not among the few badly hit countries.

massive damages, fellow humans being stranded ontop of their roofs; being driven away from home by a disaster that's taken down a whole city; anyone in a right mind would at least offer to do something. Even if the country we are talkin about is the richest country in the world. there's no excuse for not offering any kinda assitance at all.

we all know that it's very unlikely our help would be used as countries with better emergency task force with better equipments would be the prefered choice; but the thoughts really do count. Even by sending a container of our famous Maggi mee(curry flavour) over; that will surely solve the hunger problem of some of the homeless.

saddens me to see name of countries like Indonesia and Sri Lanka in the list and not ours. and to think about it. all ASEAN coutries other than us and Brunei has offered help.

We are Caring Malaysians? No?

Nav Bar removed

2005-09-02T16:31:00.000+08:00

I've managed to remove the Blogger's Navigation Bar from the top of the page. Thanx to God that's shown me the way.

If you want to do the same to your. The instructions are H E R E

New Look

2005-09-01T16:28:00.000+08:00

My first attempt to really sit down and learn the codes. Hope KY will stop complaining about the display. Reason i change from previous standard blogspot template was because my side window only appear right after the last post. no idea what happened. that's the reason i changed into some other skin.

anyway, thanx to cass for the banner. after looking n looking i think the one without my picture would be more suitable.... sorry babe.

Merdekaaaaa!

2005-08-30T14:46:00.000+08:00

Sempena 31 haribulan ogus ini. seperti yang di cadangkan oleh Shireen gua akan cuba mem'blog dalam bahasa melayu

Apa topik kita pada hari ini?

Soalan yang baik!

Merdeka?

Boring laa... semua orang pun blog pasal itu. Jom kita cakap pasal zaman kanak kanak dulu.

Suatu masa dahulu ada seorang budak bernama Ah Meng. Dia berkawan rapat dengan Iskandar atau nama glamour nya Alex. Mereka berdua sangat rapat semasa kecil. Bemain badminton sekali, tendang bola di padang atau pun bermain ping pong bersama sama.

Dimana kamu nampak salah satu dari mereka. Pasti seorang lagi ada berdekatan. kedua dua ada sebuah basikal. jadi, macam hantu la mereka berdua merayau rayau. kadang kadang masuk hutan mandi di air terjun, kadang kadang ke kampung kayu ara tangkap ular. kerap kali mereka pulang ke rumah dan kena marah kau kau sama ibubapa mereka. oh sorry bagi alex cuma ibu. bapa dia sudah mati semasa kecil dulu.

anyway suatu hari, mereka bertembung dengan balan. balan rakan sekolah yong sebaya dengan mereka tetapi jahatnya; 3-4 kali lebih setan.

balan : woi lu orang tau lancap ka?
alex : hah? game apa tu?
meng : ehhhh balan ajar la
balan : bodo! bukan sukan la.. lancap pakai kote lu la
alex : huh?
meng : ku ku ciao? apa macam?
alex : ehhh pakai konek? tak mau laaaaaaaaaa nanti sakit
balan : wah kamu orang belum try mesti tak tau la. best punya la.....
meng : eh tambi! cepat laaaa apa macam mau buat?

Ketiga tiga mereka menanggalkan seluar...

balan : first you kasi stim dulu. stim makna kasi keras tau?
alex : HAHAHAHAHA!!!! balan tak sunat!!!!!!
balan : *ketuk kepala alex* Diam la!!!! mau belajar tak mau?
Meng : woi melayu! lu diam laaa.... kukujiao saya tak boleh stim la...
alex : cina bodoh. u geletek itu bola la. mesti stim punya.
Balan : woi cepat laaaaaaaa sudah naik sudah naik.. ok .. ok... lu orang kasi goncang ini macam *goncang*goncang*goncang*
Balan : nanti ada air pancut dari kote punya.....

tiba tiba,

Balan : ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... *sembur mani di atas dinding*
Alex : woi kenapa cepat saya belum laaaaaaaa....
Meng : Alex jangan cepat sangat kita satu kali la....
balan : woi tembak tempat sama macam saya!!!

selepas beberapa minit,

Meng : AWASSS kesatriaaa baja hitammmm TEMBAKKK *sembur di tempat yang sama*
Alex : ahhhhhhh sayaaaaa punnn *pliak pliak pliak*

Balan : woi syok ka..
Meng & Alex : wah best laa feelin.
alex : rasa macam wet dream la. best!

Meng : ehhh kamu dua. tengok sama itu dinding. kita 3 punya anak anak ada kat dinding la.
Balan : bodoh. itu bukan anak la. u tembak dalam puki alex punya kakak baru boleh ada anak
Alex : pantaaat u balan!
Balan : muahahaha

Meng : ehhh tengok tu... itu mani semua sudah campur sekali. balan hitam, kau coklat dan aku putih. tapi mani boleh campur jugak ya?
Alex : mesti la :) kalau tidak kita mana boleh satu gang. kita semua satu keluarga kan kan?
Balan : ya la!

Alex, Balan & Meng : *walks away* jong jong inai mak ipong rajawali..... jong jong inai.........

Sekian sahaja untuk Hari Kebangsaan ini. ditahun depan kita cuba lagi?

GUA CAYA LU LA!

If Petronas is intrested to use this for the next year's merdeka commercial :P kindly drop me an email. Muahahahahahahahahaha..........

Malaysia Boleh.............

2005-08-29T09:37:00.000+08:00

As we approach the 48 years celebration of independence. Suddenly it seems like we are back in 1957

today in the paper there's a topic about MAS' plan to hire a foreign CEO. best laaa! CEO for Astro also import. kwai lous damn yau ying(cool) right? but WTF?? we are not in 1957??? after so many years of independence i am sure we have malaysians smart enough to run a company like MAS or even Proton; which is our countries icon. what the fuck are this people in MAS thinking?

Anyway a good example is FAM and state football associations. until today we are still losing to little countries like singapore in the international circuit. why? SAMEEEE LAA!! import only.... n someore size of singapore is like a mole on the butt but still they produce good capable people. why malaysia cannot? penisula + east malaysia so big surely got someone that is capable. if really don't have... we still got alot of orang utan being trained in sabah. graduate one of em quicker and put em up as CEO of proton la. Not like it'll make any difference because we are also taking a risk with the foreinger. success is not guaranteed.

foreigners come and go... money in and out.... but then the standard n level of skill? right there n then before the foreginers even came. who does the government invest so much in education, uITM, Mara, etc... and then place some kwai lou up on top. We might as well start more training schools for orang utan or burung kaka tua do run major companies in the country.

to think about it..... I honestly have nothing against foreginers. yah hoh... why am i so pisss hearing such news. Anyway i don't think a Chinese will likely be put up to lead a company like that. but sei kwai lou ok laaaa.. they r better mah(eh shaolin no offense ya? national day :))

to think about it; why does all of this concern me? as a non bpr i'm not affected by such action.... fuck and i wasted 15 minutes of my time typing the above... sorry ya to have u read through it.

go a head! hire a foreigner!!!

MALAYSIA BOLEH!

The Ugly Side of KL..... you think?

2005-08-25T11:21:00.000+08:00

XX wrote about how the bloody KL-ians are such dishonest bunch.

As someone whose been breed n raised in KL i wish i could refute all that's she stated but then hey :) that’s how it is in the tourism industry. Guess what; it happens everywhere in the world (except for Singapore as said). It doesn't happen in Singapore because everyone there have been brainwashed and programmed to do things so precise and systematically; and of course law abiding. However, that; IMO does turn people into such boring thing. Sometimes I think people like Rockson are the chao ah beng(to some of you) that’s making a change and bringing cheers n laughter to ‘highend’, ‘upthere’ people who thinks that education and wealth have elevated them above the lowly beings.

You go anywhere in the world. SURELY it's the same. Except for of course Singapore which the people are so proud off. Not trying to turn this into a My vs Sg battle, am I wrong to say that everywhere in the world there are shitheads that will tarnish the name of their country. You go to HK you are FORCED to ‘tip’ the tour guides, Shenzhen where they’ll force u to buy Chinese medication which will cure your so called ailments or getting charged RM$80 for a strip show in Haatyai just to find out that entrance free was only Bth$40. it’s all part n parcel of being a tourist. If you cannot tolerate such behavior stay in ya country and don’t bother going anywhere else, especially the Asian countries.

As a tourist; do expect all this! Unless u have local friends that’ll show you around, be prepare to be taken for a ride by people in some foreign land. But then guess what.. It’s not just the foreigner. As a local, sometimes as we travel around Malaysia itself ;)), we local do get taken for a ride too. Just not as badly I guess.

Oh by the way, it doesn't matter if you are a local or foreigner, if you have a pair of tits, at a packed place, with all kinda people, do prepare to be manhandled. like i said earlier, shitheads do exist everywhere; so do perverts. what you can do? walk with ya hands in front protectin ya tits. look at people deep into their eyes. that will scare some off. these are simple thing i guess that'll at least deter people from even trying. i know this ham chu saus(salty pig hands) are assholoes. they should be arrested and have their ballz cut off and hung around their neck to diffrentiate them from decent people. still.. i do think that you ladies should do something to protect yaself against such pricks

But hey.. i don't have tits... what do i know?

Rudeness….
I can tolerate

Bitchyness…..
Go stick ya thumb in the anus. probably that'll stop ya from bitching...

The PD weekend

2005-08-22T11:39:00.000+08:00

Cass told me i was the only one that said the PD rave was good. It's a suprise considering the amount of people there and the star Dj(Johan Gielen) played some really nice tunes at the main arena. As she's said it's probably the people you are with. We were docked right in front of the stage, with the beach ball, the non stop refill of beer and many hot stuff in bikinis how bad can that be?

The only problem that nite was to get to use the toilet. the queue is like an hour long. if ya body triggers for ya to go take a leek do you fucking think u still have an hour left? i was so tempted to walk up n down the queue n go "shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.. shhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" but then :Pi thought.. people act more violent with influence of drugs and those feng tau kakis can claim insanity even if they kill u. decided against doing it then.....

anyway we left back to kl at about 3. on the way out there was this chic. not that bad looking. she was in cuffs. poor girl. wonder what she did. my only suspicious was she was probably a pusher. first time see some cun chic in cuffs. a bit turn on tim....

the music was loud, the phone lines were jammed, every other available little piece of land by the side of the road is a car. that nite, I pity the PD residents.....

reach home close to 5 am and slept for a few hours before phone rang again... darn.. work :(

No mask? No worries!

2005-08-19T14:07:00.000+08:00

If we do run out of mask... would you share ya bra with me?

The Holiday!

2005-08-19T10:20:00.000+08:00

Came back from the holiday fully recharged.

It was a really enjoyable week in Penang and then Langkawi. and bestest thing was, i did not really have to pay for anything. 3 of my friends from Hong Kong/China( when i was working there 2 years ago) came over for a visit with their partners.

The word fabulous is not even close to describing a holiday which u do not have to pay for stayin in nice 5 stars hotels and dining on lobsters, monster mantis prawns and urm; lou fu pan(tiger garupa) every nite. All i need to do is be their tour guide :)

anyway the day started off wit me pickin em up from Le Meridien and we head off to Penang. Rented a coach which cost us about $800 to get us to the hotel in penang. For lunch, a stop at Ipoh is a sure must if you have tourist from Hong Kong.

Stayed in Penang for 2 days.. nothing much really. Had great seafood at teluk bahang. hawker food for lunches and lots of swimming at the hotel pool.

Left to Langkawi on a ferry from the Penang Ferry Jetty. about 2 hours ride before we landed on the island. I wanted to rent a big mpv for 8 of us but then they say no.. rent 4 cars instead. they wanna do the tourist thing n drive around themselves sometimes. stayed in this cun place called the Andaman. quite far off the town area. but then :) the surroundin nature is damn cun. u have real squirrels running around, monkeys picking each others kutu and real iguanas around the hotel surroundin. they even have this huge comordore lizard which is the resident of the pool at the hotel.

We drank lots, eat lots and one of the hongkie guy even got a taste of our local tradition.

Piew : Shiang, ngor tei pei chai lou char pai. mo pai ah tim shuin? (we are stop at a road block. no license how?)
ME : urmm... kau kor tin wah pei gor yan. ( pass the phone to the person there)
Piew : ok..

Me : Bang... sorry ya apa salah ah?
Bond : Ah you ni siapa?
Me : Saya kawan. Apa salah dia orang ya?
Bond : Kita ada road block sini. you punya kawan takde lesen, tak pakai seat belt
Me : aiyah sorry la bang boleh tolong sikit ah? dia orang semua pun tourist lesen passport semua tinggal kat hotel
Bond : aiyah u cakap la macam mana mau tolong.
Me : saya suruh dia orang kasi $50 settle la boleh bang?
Bond : u suka la saya tak ape punya i tau dia orang pun tourist. tak mau kacau dia orang la....
Me : ok ok boleh pass in telepon kat dia?

Me : Piew Kor.. yau $50 pei hei mo? (do you have $50)
Piew : hahhh........ mo wohh.. $18 yau ahh.. high tea yong sai tit chin chor. hei yu mm yu ga?( Only $18. used up all the money at high tea. is it enuff?)
Me : ngor mun yat mun sin... ( let me ask first)

Me : bang duit malaysia takde la.. apamacam
Bond : hah.... macam tu susah mau tolong la.
Me : ok ok.. duit HK boleh?
Bond : itu boleh la

Me : Piew ko yau mo $100 kong pai ah ? (do you have HK$100?)
Piew : yau ah. hei de you? (got. that will do?)
Me : hai ah... (yes)

He pass the money to the person and paid his fine the Malaysian Style!

A much needed break for a long long time.......... tis weekend we'll b kickin it out in PD!!

Nicky is Missing!

2005-08-19T10:09:00.000+08:00

RM10,000 REWARD: Nicky, the tiger cub which was saved from the cooking pot, is missing – possibly kidnapped – from Malacca Zoo.

The Haze

2005-08-11T12:21:00.000+08:00

Yes i know thousand of others have already blog about this. But then not many have provided solution to this problem

Every fucking year, our wonderful neighbour will air deliver such package to us. and this happen every year without fail. Surely after 1-2 years, precaution could have been taken and action carried out to solve this issue. It use to be a small problem, but not anymore.... Schools gotta b closed, people falling sick, weather going crazy, shops losing business n tourist having second thoughts about coming for holidays. It's slowly eating into our economy. (which at current state is already bad)

What can we do?

We cannot every year send firemen to Indonesia. the fund would be coming out of us taxpayer. why have we gotta pay when you are reaping from the timbers and land clearance! if you know there'll b fire.. take precautions.....

So?

The garmen should first of all demand more than just an appology! A single sorry EVERY year does not fucking justify you polluting our air!

Remember months back when Indonesia was preparing their army when things got hostile? if we were really to war them. we would have lost. why? all they need to do is just send some smoke into ya eyes. n the capital of our nation crumbles. This could be their test to see how they could create chaos on us! How fast it affect us. How fast our peasantry are falling sick, how fast schools are closing... and how FUCKING SLOW the garmen is reacting to this.

We need more capable people running things!

We need capable people telling us the actual figure of the API! not something like;

A) CHin jia sui!
B) OK OK
C) No problem
D) A bit dusty
E) Ok kua..
F) Urmm.. No Comment..

Siao meh! if the garmen canot decide for us. Let us decide for ourselves if it's safe to go out. I know we can't do much even knowing the index but at least it could let u decide if we want to use up our OWN annual leave to stay at home n avoid such hazard. Not everyone's body resistance is the same towards such polluted air.

But i'm sure the only thing garmen is worried about is not being able to attract the Ninjas and Darthvaders from the Middle East. By the way people are not stupid. new spreads around. the slowler a garmen respond to such issues, the more incapable they potray themselves to the world.

It's been over a week and until today all we were told is, this haze will only go away by Oct! what the FUCK! 2 more months of such air? not even 2 weeks and so many people have fallen sick. 2 months of this??

I have never so much wish n look forward to havin a rainy day as i do now.... Lets hope it rains within this few days or we will totally be in some major shit...

I hope everyone's well n takin care of themselves. I've just recovered from flu. days earlier the nose couldn't stop dripping. n finally when it did the area around the nose is all dried up like a prune. probably from too much rubbin n blowing. (NO! i did not use toilet roll... Premier Facial tissue) My dad is falling sick, cass is sick... 4 people at work are blowing their nose every few minutes... everyone is sick...

But still.... the only solution we hear is.. Drink more water.......... (u really should!)

p/s and i can't fucking wait to leave to Penang on saturday!

Letter to HSBC

2005-08-09T15:08:00.000+08:00

I can't get over the thought of this people calling me early in the morning and get me out of bed and all so they could meet their quotas.

SO i've decided to write a letter to em all and see what their reply would be like

The letter...

I have received 2 phones call this morning (09-08-05) from your so called HSBC call center (03-21454204 and 03-21441676). I was spoken to by a Malay lady first which requested from me my home address. I was told my name was recommended by a friend of mine who’s applied for a credit card with your company. On me questioning what this address is for; she told me it’s so they could send me some brochures of their credit card.

I said NO 3 times to her which she still was insisting for. I just hang up the phone after saying no for the 3rd time.

About 5 minutes later. Another call came in. This time I asked who I was speaking to. I was told his name was Andrew. He again asked for my home address. This time I angrily told him I’m not interested in ANY of your credit cards. Which he then said sorry. It’s not for the credit cards. It’s for emergencies in case the bank needs to contact my friend and could not get him. I told him that was not what the Malay lady told me. He apologizes again and says she probably got the info wrongly. I asked him why was my address needed then? The bank could just call me in emergencies? And also I’m sure in case of emergencies my friend would have put names of his family members whom he’s living with. If at any times this is ALL true. That it is your requirement to have my address. Then it would only be right for my friend to ask it from me to be put into the application form. NOT from your staff or anyone calling me on the phone.

After few minutes of harassment from this Andrew, I just gave in and gave him my office address. If at any instance I receive any mailings from HSBC I’ll be placing complains to relevant people as I do believe that how you banks do business should be more ethical than that. Not hassling your ways into getting information from people you call randomly.

Irritating Phone Calls

2005-08-09T12:41:00.000+08:00

This morning i received a phone call from this people at HSBC

Lady : Hi Mr Saikua?
ME : yes.
Lady : I'm calling from HSBC. Calling regarding this credit card that your friend mr J Tan has applied for.
ME : ok...
Lady : Can we have your address please?
ME : What for????
Lady : So we can send u some brochures for our credit card application
ME : I do not want any credit card
Lady : No No No.. All we need is just an address so we can do some mailing to you
ME : I am not intrested
LAdy : Don't worry it's just some brochures. We just need your addresss
ME : I think you're either deaf or stupid. I DON'T WANT

*hangs up*

10 minutes later

Man : Good morning Mr Saikua
ME : Yes?
Man : I'm calling from HSBC again. My colleague called earlier to ask for your address.
ME : I already say i'm not intrested. are you guys stupid or something?
Man : No.. No.. i think you got us wrongly. Your friend applied for a credit card and put ya name as someone to contact incase of emergencies.
ME : What the heck for? but that was not what your earlier colleague said
Man : Urmm.. urmm... i think she got it wrongly.
ME : ARe you sure he did? why didn't he put his brother or sisters numbers? Are you sure?
Man : yes. can we have your address?
Me : No i don't wanna give you my address?
Man : oh we r just doing our job
Me : ok.. listen. whois this i'm speaking to?
Man : urmm... Andrew.
ME : ok andrew. here's my address No 13 Tingkat 13, Jalan Chap Sar 13/13, Batang Kali, Selangor
Man : urmm.......
ME : what other info do u need?
Man : well urmm. Nevermind thank you *hangs up*

In the future i shall not waste any of my time ever to be nice to this telemarketers. if u are calling from the bank which i do not have any transactions with i'll just hang out. this is total harrassment. anyway to treat stupid people, i guess u gotta just go as slow. I know it's just part of his job. but then being a prick is not part of the requirement. and what right has it to harrass me that way to get my address?

and oh yeah! jeff did get to hear some colourful words from me for being a smart ass by giving away my name and number that way. it did spoil a not that bad morning for me.............

Mr Teapot

2005-08-08T13:39:00.000+08:00

No, this is not in terrenganu. This is what you find in the middle of the KL city. Located around the Bukit Bintang area, this Arab Square is suppose to attract more Arab tourist. But then what was the purpose of all this structures? i thought the local council will run em down?

I remember reading Suanie's post some time back regarding this matter; but i couldn't find the link to it. her article questions the need for such street because if i was an Arab, i wouldn't wanna visit malaysia just because they've got an Arab street. If i was Ali Baba and i'm on holiday in malaysia, i am here so i can try out the satay, slurpp on the tau fu faaa and snack on some papadam. Not some arab food where they have every single day of their life from where they come. I would wanna go buy fake rolex in Petaling street, or seek those Tongkat Ali or Gambir at Masjid Jamek. If i'm horny I could go find 132 in Federal Hotel. Why come to malaysia if you wanna go back to Arab Square?

Wonder if they can turn SS2 into Beijing Street or not? ohhh but i doubt so.. not all chinese are filthy rich like those arabs.

-------------------------
What is Gambir?

Sometime ago when Jeff just came back from Kuching.

Me : Eh Jeff.. how was kuching? anything good?
Jeff : nothing laaa there alot of those herbal n traditional medicines
Me : ohh yah hoh! gambir, sarawak alot right?
Jeff : ohh yeeahh laa :) my colleague bought some. quite expensive.
ME : how is it use?
Jeff : urmm they chopped it into tiny pieces and chew it
Me : what does it do?
Jeff : sexually stronger kua...

Nex day,

Me : Eh Stan gambir jeff say chew one ah?
Stan : What the fuck?? my malay colleague bought and told me 'sapu'(rub) on the dick one. makes the penis numb.
ME : huh?
Stan : So can fuck longer laaa....

Calls Jeff

Me : eh jeffff you take gambir so u can blowjob who la???

Lesson of the day :Tau sikit sikit don't go pan toi piew! (if u ain't sure ; don't go pretend to know it all)

The Vacation

2005-08-08T13:08:00.000+08:00

Cunnneesst!

starting this friday i'll b on holiday till next thursday!

Bunch of friends from Hong Kong will be coming over and i'll be their tour guide for the whole week. There'll probably be alot of feeding and drinking going around.

First nite(Friday) they'll be here in KL. Probably meeting them up with my bosses here cuz they wanna tar chiew fu this people. Then after dinner probably bring them somewhere to get drunk. will be sending our representative; Dragon to drink with them.

Sat n Sunday will be spent in Penang. Probably one nite seafood and second nite at food stalls.Gonna spend the days relaxing and swimming. Will be staying at Gurney Hotel. They wanted some 5 star hotels but then, i think Gurney would be the better choice.

On Monday morning we'll b leaving to Langkawi island :) booked this hotel called The Andaman. have got good feedbacks from people who's been there and am lookin forward to this island holiday for sometime now. Only problem is i'm not sure about the food part as this HK tourist is alwiz on the lookout for good food. Any one's got good recommendation for food in the langkawi island?

Oh i was asked why not Genting. THIS IS WHY . Anyway HK is about an hour from Macau weren't really interested in the first place even.

Will be back Thursay next week :)

The 10 reasons

2005-08-05T13:59:00.000+08:00

Tingting wanted a time out during our conversation so she could go take a fag. So this was what she did

tingting® says:
anyway, for the time being, think of 10 great things why u want to be with this emi

1) she can speak mandarin. i get turn on by those manjafied mandarin. like those tawainese chicks on Astro 32/33. she's chinese ed. and i alwiz believe chinese ed girls are more polite
2) she's fun. she laughs.. she doesn't giggle
3) she's not hokkien. all the girls that things went bad for me are all hokkiens. the only hokkien gal i'll ever marry right now would be Cassie btw. Emi's hakka
4) she's from Ipoh
5) she's got a really good job n all. not that kinda that will wanna depend on ya. asset not liability
6) she's got baby fat
7) outgoing. urmm kinda like cassie. can throw her in an island n she'll make friends
8) she's single and available
9) very yau sum. first time i met her. she knew a friend(whom i know her from) of mine has sore throat she brought over some extra leong cha from home. wah i damn gum tong even though it was not for me.
10) none that i was with b4 were from chinese ed.

Yippepepe yipepepepe

2005-08-05T13:06:00.000+08:00

When i first told Fiona i've got a target to go after. One of her first few questions were

"Have i slept with her?"

Which was of course NO!

To think about it. The thought of sex never cross my mind at all. I'm not sure why but at times there r some ladies which u find attractive that'll excite u and the next thought you have in mind is wow it would be great if i get to bed her.

But there r some ladies no matter how revealing they dress or speak, when u fall for her the lust is just not there. I'm not saying she's not attractive enough. It's just that you will look at her in a different prespective. Leaning more towards the non sexual beauty of her. Why? i can't explain.

Maybe it's like what Fiona told me, guys get to differentiate love n lust but for girls, lust comes along with love. How true is it for me but it's not really right to generalize this way as one man's med is another man's poison. Some would probably disagree.

N btw :) I've met Emi through a friend John. I've met her for the first time like 5 years ago. and just recently we bump into each other again and we started talking. Grew fond of her and we kinda click. Tried to date her a couple of times and she's ok'ed it but at the last minute she cancelled cuz of some urgent matters.

I kinda gave up whatever funny feelings i had on her but then was told by john i gave up too easily. i just didn't know how should i continue without sounding too desperate or forceful. So i stop calling that often after she cancelled for the 3rd time.

John tried to push for it again and asked us both to the launching of Loft's Disco Motion on wednesday nite. it gave me a chance to try start the flame again. we chat, we drink n had fun the whole nite. had so much fun we did the same thing again at the same place the following day.

Anyway right now i'm all excited again about her. i'm just not sure how long would it be till i get shot down again... wonder if it'll work this time?

*MSN Quote
tingting® says:
btw, one thing about hakka women, they are evil

Lets just hope i don't get burn that badly this time :P

The Star

2005-08-04T14:03:00.000+08:00

Wednesday August 3, 2005
Sultan and prince visit Star Media Hub
SHAH ALAM: Sultan Sharafuddin Idris Shah and his 14-year-old son the Raja Muda Tengku Amir Shah visited the Star Media Hub here yesterday.

Thursday August 4, 2005
Late delivery of The Star
Delivery of The StarPETALING JAYA: The Star apologises to its readers for the late delivery of the newspaper today due to technical problems.

HMMMMMMMMMMM...........................

Sorry cik, i no money...

2005-08-03T09:37:00.000+08:00

This is what you'll get if u are gonna drive through a toll booth without a single cent :) And yeah it happened to this female friend......

Kereta besar besar satu sen pun tak de

Get Ya Tickets!!

2005-08-02T12:30:00.000+08:00

R3VELATION @ PD

Get ya tickets early boys and girls! Unless u wanna go through the smelly ketiaks and ugly fuckface bitch; go get ya tickets NOW! :)

Hopefully lots of chicks in bikinis... mauahahaha it's gonna be gooodddd!

Are YOU going?

How to plan?

2005-08-02T10:20:00.000+08:00

Guys :) kinda need ya help with this. i've got a bunch of friends from china. coming over for a 7 days vacation.

and they left me to plan on what to do n where to go.

Honestly i'm kinda lost. they will be arriving on Friday 12 August which is about 10 days from now. so i really think i should be quite done with the plans and also the hotel bookings for them already.

They asked if it's possible to go langkawi. but then everyone's been telling me langkawi is reallly really boring. which i reckon is quite true. they love good food and beaches. so penang is already in the plan.

what can we make most out of a 7 days 6 nite stay in malaysia?